Posts Tagged ‘Intention’

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Choosing and Using

Sunday, January 29th, 2012

In the mid-1990s, I attended a powerful workshop on abundance presented by Unity teacher  Edwina Gaines.  Somewhere in her workshop, she said, “What is up to you.  How is up to God.”  It’s the only thing I remember from the workshop, probably because at the time I was caught up in the importance of taking action.  Even though she continued with, “Listen for the divine idea,” I couldn’t get past my own belief in the need to do. I had experienced the difference between affirmations that worked and those that didn’t, and I saw that difference as aligning emotion with thought.  And I had observed over and over again the necessity of also aligning actions – putting words on paper if you want to write a book, putting miles on the bike if you want to take pack trips, eating right if you want to be healthy, etc.

So I pondered and puzzled over Edwina’s words, and after about a decade, I finally got it.  I finally learned to differentiate the what from the how. I saw that what is the essence of free will.  As human beings, choosing what is our opportunity, our responsibility, our obligation.  No force in the universe (not even God) can choose for us.  We must choose, and choosing what must come first.  If we jump too quickly into the how, we’ll end up with the wrong what. Further, if we try to control the how we limit the miracle.

Taking on Your Part

However, since I’ve been working with the modes of personal power, I’ve begun to see aspects of how that do belong to us.  The more I work with emotions, the more I see them as the energy of how. Emotional energy is the force that empowers results.  If you want a certain result, you can identify the emotional energy that produces the outcome, generate that emotion within you and then use the energy to fuel the result you’ve chosen.  This is not exerting power over your emotions so much as accessing the power of your emotions.  In this respect, identifying and investing emotional energy is the how that’s up to you.

I’ve also been observing another interaction between what and how that blurs the boundary between them even more.  When you decide you want something, it’s totally natural, perhaps instinctive, to immediately begin mapping out the route between here and there.  Whether you call this a business plan, a plan of attack, a project plan, or merely a to-do list, you gain confidence in your idea when you assure yourself of the potential for success by envisioning the means to get there.  If you can’t see the how, you may discard the idea immediately.  This could be called the process of how-to-what.

Moving From What to How

Consider instead a what-to-how approach.

Begin by identifying what you want.  You can be as broad or as particular as you like, but use specific terms.  A general sense of something, expressed in general terms can come out hazy and not quite formed, i.e., “I’d like to get to a place in my heart where I can let go of animosity towards others,” or “It’d be nice if I could feel confident enough of my voice to sing in front of people.”

Instead, either the broad statement, “I want joy,” or the specific statement, “I want a happier relationships with _______,” gets more to the heart of what you want.  You can say, “I want to live on purpose,” or you can say, “I want to sing at the Met,” and either one can be perfectly accurate and true for you.

To illustrate this for yourself, draw a pyramid on a piece of paper.  Draw a horizontal line slightly below the peak of the pyramid, forming a small triangle on top.  Write what you want in the triangle.  This is your intention.  At this point, don’t give a single thought to the large space below the line.  Everything below this topmost level is how.

Sometimes we choose things that aren’t true for us.  Sometimes we resist something that is true for us.  The first how that belongs to you is to make your intention absolutely, totally, 100% true for you.

You may already have a deep emotional connection with what you want.  If so, this aspect of how may feel pretty straightforward and easily itemized.  Whether you have the connection or want to achieve it, the following practice will help you strengthen and empower your intention.

  • Imagine what you want as accomplished, manifest, complete, a done deal.

Refuse to let doubts and potential obstacles interfere with this envisioning.  If you want joy, imagine you have it.  If you want a relationship with someone to be happy, imagine it is. If you want to be living your purpose, imagine you are.  If you want to sing at the Met, imagine you’re on the stage.  See it accomplished, real, now.

If you can’t quite imagine what you want as real, find something comparable you have experienced and recall the feeling.  Perhaps seeing yourself on stage at the Met is a bit of a stretch, but when you ski you maneuver the moguls with ease and confidence.  Remember the success and pleasure you experience on a challenging slope.  Once you feel it, it’s transferable.

  • As you envision what you want as fulfilled, let the emotion(s) of fulfillment bubble up within you.  Recognize them and name them.  Do you feel happiness?  Joy?  Peace?  Love?  Confidence?  Exhilaration?  Gratitude?
  • Let yourself experience these emotions to the fullest.  Be them.  Let them expand and fill your entire body.  Let them flow down your arms and legs to your fingers and toes.  Feel the vibrations of them as fully and completely as you can.
  • Think about your intention and envelop it in this heightened level of your emotions.  Infuse it with these emotions.
  • At least once a day, repeat this exercise.  Imagine, identify, experience, infuse.

Emotion as How

Choosing and using Partner and Creator emotions is your part of how. This practice will help you align your thoughts and emotions with each other and with your intention.

When you become truly, fully aligned with your intention, it becomes accomplished.  You may not be joyful to the exclusion of pain or suffering, but you see such joy as both possible and attainable.  You may not yet be fully living your purpose, but you are fully connected and aligned with that purpose.  You may not yet be singing at the Met, but you know without a doubt performance is your destiny.  You may not yet have a loving relationship with someone, but you have unflinching trust best good for both of you.

And now it’s time to look below the pinnacle of the pyramid.  Using horizontal lines, divide the large space into several sections to represent the steps of how – the journey from where you are to where you want to be.  Some journeys may have two or three steps, and others may have more than ten.  What do you see as your next step along the way, the next leg of your journey?

If joy is your intention, perhaps the next step is a happy home, or peace with your body.  If a happier relationship is your intention, perhaps the next step is becoming happier with yourself.  If singing at the Met is your intention, perhaps the next step is gaining confidence during auditions.  If living on purpose is your intention, perhaps envisioning the way you will serve is your next step.

Whatever you see as your next step now become a what. Now you can set a new intention specific to this step.  Now you can identify the emotions that will help you partner with it and/or create it.  Now you can choose to experience those emotions.  Now you can infuse this what with those emotions.

Continue building your pyramid from the top down by converting each successive how into a what. At each level remember that everything beneath the level you’re working on will stay a how until you get there – and as long as it’s a how it’s not up to you.

Enhance your Product

Now draw a strong vertical pole from the base of your pyramid up through the peak.  This pole is your product.  Your product is what you give to others, the way you do and/or will serve with this intention.  It remains a constant, receiving your efforts, no matter what step you are on, no matter what others efforts you make in support of your intention.  What you ultimately create will be directly related to your product.  In many cases the quality of your product determines the ultimate quality of the miracle.

Some intentions have very obvious products, i.e. the knowledge, the skill, the wisdom, the techniques, the music, the manuscripts, etc.  For other intentions, the product can be more nebulous.  For instance, if you want joy, what’s the product?  Actually, joy is both the what and the how. The more you practice joy – in your heart and in your service – the more joy you’ll have.

This brings us to yet another aspect of how that is up to you.  It’s up to you to become a person who is whatever it is you want.  When you start asking, “But how do I do this?” practice responding with this answer:  “By becoming the person who is this.”  (Or has this, or does this.)

If you were already this person, you would already be or have or do.  Since you are not or have not or do not, give attention and energy to becoming.  Working on the product certainly contributes to your becoming your intention, but action must be supported by thoughts and emotions.

In instances where the intention and the journey are the same, all efforts to become are investments in the product.  The core of any product is the service you render.  If you are becoming joy, let your joy be a service to others.  The more you become your product, the more you enrich the lives of others through the state of your own heart.

Other more physical intentions also require you to be the person who does.  As you strengthen your product, refine your thinking.  As you refine your thinking, continue to evoke and express partner and creator emotions.  Through the energy of you emotions, your thoughts, and your actions, you will become the person who receives.  You will manifest the miracles you’ve chosen.

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From Soul to Heart

Sunday, August 28th, 2011

When the soul communicates through the heart, it uses emotions as the primary language. Of course, the more science learns about the brain the more we understand emotions are brain functions, just like thinking, memories, dreams and physical reactions. But that part of us we call the soul (or personality, or anima/animus, or spirit, or self) doesn’t show up on brain scans, so we can only speculate about it. And when the soul speaks to us through the emotions, we tend to feel it in our hearts.

From experience, most of us know emotions get tangled up with thoughts, can be veiled by other emotions, are often obscured by false beliefs, and become confused when in conflict with expectations, or are overpowered by the urgencies of the body. Because emotions are such strong forces, the messages can be difficult to discern.

When we understand what kinds of messages the soul conveys through emotions, we can more effectively tune into this form of inner communication.

Revealing Truth

I have a client who’s trying to make sense of a relationship. He’s with a woman he loves but they have serious communication problems, and even though they’ve broken up several times, they keep coming back together. He told me when he first started dating this woman he felt as if he’d entered a dark cloud, and he felt sort of panicky for the first few months. When they broke up the first time, he felt as if a load had been lifted off him. Yet he keeps being drawn back to her. He interprets the attraction as an indication they belong together, despite the other emotional indicators.

Emotional messages rarely project into the future. They usually have more to do with what’s happening now and what your soul needs right now. Consider the following progression of emotions:

  • Emotions from Victim mode, which include panic, fear, distress, etc., often say, “This is not a good place. Get out now.”  “Place” is usually a situation rather than a physical location. Among other possibilities, it could be a situation that’s dangerous either physically or emotionally; it could be something that’s not a good fit; it could be a toxic relationship.
  • Emotions from Interpreter mode–those that include some form of judgment–can also feel like “Get out now” messages, but usually the communication is more in the line of “Look at yourself through this lens.”  The emotions can illuminate beliefs, values, expectations, attitudes or structures that are not true for you.

It’s important to acknowledge such emotions. It’s important to recognize the ability of such emotions to leach away your personal power. It’s also important to value what they can teach you about yourself.

For instance, if you experience remorse for some choice you once made, what does your remorse tell you about you?  Do you expe­­­­­ct to be perfect?  Do you take responsibility for other people’s emotions and/or choices?  Do you believe expiation only comes after harsh punishment?

Ask yourself similar questions about any Interpreter emotion, and you may discover barriers that are keeping you stuck.

  • Your soul can speak to you using Observer mode emotions only when you free yourself from judgment. When you experience such emotions as curiosity, amazement, amusement, humility, patience and trust, the communications are filled with possibility–and you are able to see those possibilities. People become more interesting, the world becomes bigger and brighter, and opportunities abound.
  • When you open yourself to Partner mode, your soul will communicate to you through such emotions as appreciation, attention, reverence, serenity, pleasure and gratitude. These emotions are your soul’s way of saying, “Yes.”
  • Soul communications at the Creator level come in the form of such emotions as love, peace, happiness, joy, delight, and enthusiasm. The message in these emotions is always of oneness. You will know the oneness of all things. You will know you are never alone. You will celebrate life in every way.

Expanding Relationships

Through your emotions, the communications of your soul will help you learn from every relationship and expand the enduring relationships to new levels.
The first flash of a Victim mode emotion alerts you immediately to an unhealthy situation. If you’re in a relationship and you feel helpless, your soul is warning you that something is amiss. It might be something within you, in which case your first need might be to heal yourself.

Interpreter emotions are as likely to be messages regarding yourself as another person. Does your exasperation reveal an old challenge?  Does your loneliness expose an inner defense?  Does your meekness arise from unhealed wounds?  Does your disappointment indicate unmet expectations?

You can investigate the past, or you can walk away from it. Sometimes old stuff won’t let go without specific healing work. Often, a simple acknowledgment is enough, and you’re able to can move on.

For persistent emotions between those two extremes, I’ve discovered a delightful and revealing exercise:

Indulge. Identify the emotion, recognize it holds a lot of energy, designate a period of time (10 minutes, an hour, a whole day), and give your full attention to it. Immerse yourself in the identified emotion. Wallow in it. Support it with every story you can think of. Engage with it for the full time allotted. Do not let your attention wander. Truly, let your soul pour out the message of that emotion. Chances are, you will make some interesting discoveries about yourself, your choices, and the nature of the relationship. If, when your time is up, you don’t feel a keen separation from that emotion, schedule another session.
You can only begin to know someone else when you free yourself of judgment and enter Observer mode. Observer emotions allow you to see others for what they are. You become aware of their unique gifts, their talents, their abilities, their attitudes, their joys and sorrows. At the highest levels of observation, you might admire, adore and celebrate them. You will also recognize what they are not, and these aspects of them will not feel like deficiencies. Rather, what they are not will support and reinforce who they are.

You can only form a healthy, lasting relationship with someone when you reach out to them from Partner mode. When your soul speaks through willingness, affection, appreciation, respect, confidence and serenity, and the other person is equally confident and serene, you establish a bond with each other that neither time nor distance can sever.

Oneness comes when you internalize Creator emotions such as love, delight, happiness, peace, and optimism.

These communications apply to any relationship. Your soul says, “Change this,” using Victim emotions. Your soul helps you look at yourself using Interpreter emotions. Your soul presents possibilities using Observer emotions. Your soul says, “Go for it,” using Partner emotions. And your soul merges with the other using Creator emotions.

Strengthening Your Intentions

Your soul is your not-so-silent partner when it comes to your choices and intentions. The truer a choice or intention is for you, the more likely you will be to align with it and manifest it. And when it comes to what’s true for you, your soul is the most knowledgeable and reliable source of wisdom available to you.

  • Recognize Victim emotions as reliable signals of a need for change.
  • Let Interpreter emotions illuminate your barriers, your resistance, your doubts, and your challenges. Listen to them, then exercise your power to move up to the next level of soul communication. Opportunities and possibilities only become evident when in Observer mode. If you’re seeing difficulty, if you’re experiencing struggle, if complications keep coming up, or accidents seem more frequent than normal–you’re still in Interpreter mode. Become conscious and mindful of your emotions. Attune to the message of the emotion (the message is always to stop judging), and move in a different direction.
  • Attuning to Observer emotions will set you on an easier path.
  • The magical alignment of thoughts, actions and emotions occurs in Partner mode. Obstacles cannot exist at this level. You partner with yourself, with your intention, and with the infinite. You welcome teachers, you attract allies, you are alert to opportunities, you stride forward confidently, doors open, you experience some form of cooperation everywhere you turn.
  • At Creator level, you and your intention are one. Your intention simply is, and you simply are.

Embracing Your Purpose

When people say they want to live a more purposeful life, or they want to become clearer about their specific purpose, I suspect something inside them (the soul, perhaps) is urging them to reach out and give more to the world. I also suspect part of the message is to expand their personal power so they have more to give.

From working with many people who have reached this point, I’ve concluded every person’s purpose as two basic parts:  What we came here to learn, and why we came here to give. Sometimes these two aspects of purpose are intertwined; some people have to learn what they came to learn in order to give what they came to give. Sometimes there’s no apparent connection; the gift is apparent in the person’s talents while the lesson is in a completely different aspect of life.

You can know what you came to give by looking at your talents and abilities, and you can understand your ability to share that gift by looking at your emotions. Likewise, you can know what you came to learn by looking at what you find most difficult, and you can understand your willingness to learn whatever the lesson is by looking at your emotions.

  • Victim mode emotions will always be immobilizing.
  • Interpreter mode emotions will illuminate your relationship with either your talents or your challenges.
  • Observer mode emotions will provide you with a calm, solid place from which to practice, learn, interact, understand, and choose.
  • Partner mode emotions will unite you with either the gift or the growth. They will inspire you, deliver opportunities onto your doorstep, energize you, sustain you through tough times, and challenge you.
  • Creator mode emotions will bring you into oneness with your transcendent self.

Listen to your emotions as you listen to your mind and your body. Your soul communicates with you 100% of the time, using every available means to communicate with you.

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Impeccability

Sunday, May 1st, 2011

I first encountered the concept of impeccability several years ago, while reading Carlos Casteneda’s accounting of his work with his mentor Don Juan. Don Juan claimed the first requirement to becoming a “man of knowledge” is impeccability, establishing it as essential in accessing one’s personal power. Because this was a new concept to me, I’ve pondered it, explored it, and come to see its importance.

According to the dictionary, impeccability means to be perfect, to be unblemished. Yet humans are prone to error, so what does unblemished mean in human terms?  To be free of flaws and bruises, like a peach picked carefully and handled gently?  Who could possibly live up to such a standard?  Who would want to?

I agree impeccability means perfect. I also agree with Don Juan that it has more to do with personal power than personality. I think it means becoming aware of your power, in terms of emotions and energy, understanding the nature of that power, and using it impeccably.

The power itself is always unblemished (although it can be used in destructive ways). When you access your power and utilize it toward your best good and the best good of others, you become impeccable. Here are some ways to explore your impeccability, your relationship with your own power.

Self-Consistency

Self-consistency has two parts:  self and consistency.

Self is you as you have been, as you are, and as you will be. When you understand and honor the past, present and future aspects of your life and your path, you have self. Since other people, outside influences and your sometimes-skewed interpretations of your experiences affect the person you are, becoming your true self may be one of the major challenges of your life. Sometimes you may wish you lived in a vacuum so you could be free to just be yourself, but experiences and relationships are the way we grow, a way we can test ourselves. Learn what works for you and what doesn’t by testing what you think and by observing the results of your choices.

Consistency is alignment with your self. Alignment requires constant intention and attention. First you have to know what you want and where you are going, and then you have to pay attention to your progress. Just as a pilot has to monitor the course, a carpenter has to check each angle, and a business has to watch its balance sheet, to stay consistent means watching for errors and correcting them as quickly as possible.

When your path, your desires, your energy, and your truth are steady and congruent, it’s easy to hold firm to your intentions. If you are wobbly in yourself, it’s much more difficult to remain consistent and stay impeccable. Try asking yourself these questions to help correct the wobble:

  • “What is the ideal outcome for this situation?”
  • “What do I want from this situation?”
  • “What kind of person do I want to be?
  • “What is there for me to learn in this situation?”
  • “What do I have to give in this situation?”

Know yourself. Know what’s true for you. Be as consistent as you can to yourself and what’s true for you, and you become more perfectly you. Your power grows, and you hold it more surely. While some choices may shift you slightly off course, impeccability grows whenever you practice course-correction.

Connection with the infinite

You already have access to the most powerful and positive partner there is. This partner is at hand to guide you, sustain you, assist you, enlighten you, and empower you. You can depend on this partner to answer your call no matter how faint your voice. This partner is eager to help and asks nothing in return. This powerful partner has many names; address it with the one that resonates best for you:  God, your higher power, the universe, Spirit, the ancestors, The Goddess, The Source.

Of course, the connection comes with a few conditions. These conditions are like the keys to a lock, and if you cannot or will not insert the key and unlock the door, your powerful partner is unable to enter. The conditions are:

  • You must choose what you want.
  • Your choice must be true for you.
  • Your choice must be un-conflicted.
  • You must be ready to receive the results of your choice.
  • You must be willing to hear your partner’s suggestions.
  • You must accept your partner’s help.

Through connection with your partner, your impeccability grows, your personal power increases, and what you’ve chosen becomes inevitable.

So how do you acknowledge this partner and open the channels to accept this empowered relationship?  It’s very simple.

  • Know you are not alone.
  • Be as true to yourself as you possibly can.
  • Honor yourself and respect others.
  • Employ love as your healing energy.
  • Employ happiness as your creative energy.
  • Employ gratitude as your receiving energy.

When you are impeccable, as soon as you say, “This!” your partner will say, “Yes!”

Forgiveness

Accessing your power and keeping your power strong are the two challenges of impeccability. The first comes with becoming true to yourself and linking with the universe. The second comes by strengthening the integrity of your self, and this means looking at integrity the way an engineer would (to keep the system from warping or deteriorating) or as a potter would (to keep the vessel from leaking).

One of the biggest drains on a person’s power is resentment. When you attach negative emotion to experiences from your past, your resentment becomes a leech. The stronger your resentment,  the deeper it can burrow into your soul and suck your power. The best way to shed such a power-leech and regain your impeccability is through forgiveness.

Forgiveness is often a five-step process, and while you can leap straight to step #5, you may find greater value in working through the leading steps.

  1. Become neutral. Acknowledge the facts of the situation. Acknowledge the other person(s). Acknowledge yourself and your part. What was, was. What is, is. It happened. You can’t change it. It’s over. When you keep wishing something could have been different, you’re grabbing fists full of your own power and handing it over to those you resent. Regardless of how much time has passed since the situation, you continue to cede your power to others.
  2. Extend recognition. See the other person(s) as real, as human, as acting according to what they know, what they believe, and the skills they possess. Recognize their intentions are for their version of best good. Recognize you did the best you could with what you knew, what you believed, and the skills you possess. When you accept the intention of best good (on their part and on yours), you start plugging the holes from which you have been leaking power.
  3. Provide acceptance. This step removes the energy from what the other person did and focuses instead on what you gained. Look at what you learned, how you grew, the insights you acquired. When you can look for the strengthening of your soul rather than any losses you incurred, when you transition from resistance to welcome, you begin to replenish your power.
  4. Be grateful. Let the acceptance of what you gained grow into thankfulness. You’ve already found the value in the experience, now appreciate the other person(s) for providing you with that experience. Say, either to the other person or in your own mind, “Thank you for giving me ______.” (My thanks to my wonderful friend Claire for this wisdom.)  Fill in the blank with whatever insight, strength, freedom, opportunity, new choice, and/or increased power you gained through the challenge they provided. In this way, you fully receive their gift to you, and you become aware of your power in new ways.
  5. Bless others. Blessings are given from power. When you ask for a blessing, you request it of someone (or something) with more power than you possess. When you bestow a blessing it comes from the realm of your own power. In order to bless those who might mistreat you, harm you, impose upon you, threaten you, etc., you must be centered in your own power. Every blessing you bestow not only benefits others, it increases your impeccably. Blessing others strengthens your power and increases your access to it.

Intentionality

The word intention indicates a choice.  When you choose, you become intentional. Most people, however, make choices with clear intention. The more clearly you know what you want, the more intentional you become; the stronger your intention; the more you empower your choices.

To transform a want into a choice requires intentionality. Consider these factors:

  • What you want must be true for you.
  • You must be ready and willing to be true to what you want.
  • Your must give your attention to what you want (both time and focus).
  • Your actions must align with what you want.
  • You can empower what you want with enjoyment, tranquility and/or confidence.

To be true to what you want, make sure your reasons for wanting it are true, your emotions are aligned, you understand any costs involved and agree to meet those costs, and you don’t want something else more.

You can give your time and focus to what you want through meditation, concentration and/or practice. Feel it. Visualize it. Affirm it. Practice it.  Imagine yourself in possession. Experience it as a done deal.

Perform the necessary actions to bring about what you want. If you want to write a book, sit down and put words on paper. If you want to earn a degree, enroll in a university program. If you want to increase your bank account, save instead of spend. Some intentions do not have such specific action requirements, but most do. Do what is required.

Become impeccable with respect to your intention. Keep your power strong and focused. Let the refiner’s fire strengthen your integrity.

Alignment

To build and hold impeccability, the two most important alignments are with yourself and with the infinite. Both have no limits, and you will continue to develop and refine these alignments as long as you exist.

Because you, too, are infinite, you can never fully know yourself while in a finite state. Every life experience reveals more of your character, every choice expands your possibilities, every achievement increases your power, and every lesson broadens your wisdom. Therefore alignment is a continuous process. Monitor your alignment and correct your course as needed by:

  • Reviewing your values
  • Acknowledging what’s true for you
  • Strengthening your intentions
  • Reinforcing your motivations
  • Listening to your intuition.

With every course correction, every realignment, you become more and more impeccable.

The infinite is unwavering, ever-powerful, and always there. Because it is an invisible force, however, you may occasionally forget how available and constant it is. During those times when your link with your omnipotent power thins, it’s up to you to reinforce the connection. Remember. Reach out. Receive.

Empowerment and enlightenment are like the sides of a ladder. Without both uprights, the rungs fall away. The upright post of empowerment is logic, the upright post of enlightenment is wisdom. Some situations in life require more empowerment, some more enlightenment, so your best alignment comes when you combine them.

When you are out of alignment or your integrity weakens, you are likely to leak personal power and thus your impeccability becomes bruised. Conversely, the more consistently you correct your alignment the more impeccable you become, and thus your personal power strengthens.

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Proceed With Courage

Sunday, March 6th, 2011

The alignment aspect of making miracles is often the most challenging – especially in those areas of our lives where we experience the most struggle.

An often-overlooked way to bring your thoughts and your actions into alignment with your emotions is through courage. And then, courage grows as the result of such alignment. As with many of the power principles, the way is the result and the result is the way.

The following five techniques will help you gain courage, use courage, and accept courage as the inevitable result.

1. Listen to your intuition

Your inner voice is the voice of your soul – that inner essence of you that transcends the physical and is one with the universe. Your inner voice will always be truer for you than the voices of anyone else. However, learning to trust your intuition over the advice, beliefs, agendas, opinions, habits and experiences of others may take practice.

Begin by recognizing that everyone else speaks through their own emotional filter. Consider that your emotional filter began forming when you were an infant (perhaps before you emerged from the womb), when you experienced (or didn’t) your mother’s love. Since infancy, you have been interpreting what goes on around you and assembling your view of yourself, your life and the way the world works.

From these first beginnings your emotional filter has evolved, fed by emotion, attitude, experience, in-coming information, the filters of others, your education, and assorted other inputs. Everyone accumulates an individual perspective by way of this emotional radiation, some of it true, some of it not. Generally speaking, this makes the voices of others no more reliable than your own.

Your true inner voice, however, can sidestep your emotional filter, and it’s the only voice with that power. Here are some techniques to help you hear it and trust it.

  • Turn down the volume. The world itself generates so much noise it can become nothing but static. You may need to turn off such distractions as the TV, radio, or stereo. You may need to shut your doors and windows against the external noises of your environment. You may need to limit the number of people whose opinions influence you.
  • Use the mute button. Spend some time every day in silence. This may mean devotional silence such as prayer or meditation. It may mean some kind of quiet occupation, such as reading or sewing. It may mean getting out into the silence of nature. Silence helps you gain the calm of the Observer.
  • Calm your own “monkey mind” by releasing any Victim or Interpreter emotions. Should guilt, anger or disappointment start yammering at you over past events, extend compassion to yourself or others and come back to the present. Should fear, obsession or anxiety start eating at you about the future, detach from outcome, move into trust, and come back to the present.  Remember, your thoughts and emotions are yours by choice.
  • Trust your infinite partner. Your inner voice is in direct communication with the wisdom of the universe. That wisdom is available to you at any time just for the asking. Ask and you shall receive.

As with most things, the more you listen, the more you’ll hear. As you learn to rely on your intuition, you will discover how reliable it is. When you recognize you receive reliable wisdom, it’s easier to bring your thoughts, actions and emotions into alignment.

2. Be Open

By now you know the basic formula for manifestation:  set an intention, align with that intention, receive the results. I’ve been approaching the middle step, alignment, as a task, as the inner work. Now let’s look as alignment as a gift, as a miracle.

To be open to alignment requires some effort on your part. You must dismantle your barriers, and chances are you’ve had those barriers in place a long time and have grown comfortable with them. They protect you from anything on the other side of them, even if at the same time they’re preventing you from reaching what you really want.

Opening your gates takes courage. Moving beyond your walls takes courage. Striding into the unknown takes courage. A huge part of being open is being out in the open. Exposed. Vulnerable perhaps, but if you’re hiding behind your barriers, how can the miracle find you?

What does it take to have the courage of openness?

  • Love for yourself and your fellow human beings.
  • A commitment to purpose, to what you have to learn and to what you have to give.
  • Confidence that what you want wants you.
  • Happiness.

When you adopt this courage and become open, you are more likely to experience the miracle of alignment. Alignment then produces all other miracles. When you are aligned and unconflicted, when you are congruent and connected, only best good can occur.

3. Exercise Your Emotions

Emotions are creative energy, and with every emotion you experience you create something. In most instances, the only evidence of this creation is the result:  fear creates danger, love creates healing, anger creates malignancy, etc. Because every emotion creates something, you can identify the emotions you’re experiencing by the results they produce:  if you have safety, you know peace; if you have friends and family, you exude love; if you live in abundance, you radiate openness and generosity.

Most people express their emotions and receive the result without making a connection between the two. Their emotions roil out of them willy-nilly, creating results as if by accident. Because accidents occur within whatever medium is available, it’s easy to explain the accident as the result of physical circumstances. The cause and effect can seem so perfectly logical the emotional contribution is often overlooked or ignored.

If this has been your pattern, you can break free of it by becoming conscious of your emotional energy and using it purposefully and intentionally.

Remember, you can purposefully use your emotions to create anything you want through mindfulness, intention and practice:

  • Become aware of the cause-and-effect nature of emotions. Victim emotions result in misery; Interpreter emotions result in struggle; Observer emotions result in calm; Partner emotions result in cooperation; and Creator emotions result in oneness.
  • Know what you want. The more knowledgeable and intentional you are about what you want, the more you can manifest that specific result.
  • Practice. Apply the appropriate emotion to the specific situation.

Have the courage to use your emotions to create intentionally. Be confident enough to choose what you want. Be brave enough to acknowledge what you feel. Be fearless enough to choose the emotions that will create the life you want.

4. Allow Best Good

How much courage does it take to envision best good?  A lot. Usually because most people restrict best good. Some common restrictions are:

  • Best good is bigger than most people can imagine, so they don’t try.
  • Most people think of best good in terms of “reward,” something that must be deserved in order to be received.
  • Many people want to withhold best good from others, and thus withhold it from themselves.
  • Some people are afraid of best good.

There are two restrictions on best good. The first is existing circumstances. Given existing circumstances, best good is the best possible outcome. For instance, in winter, best possible good is probably not a sudden swing into summer. The second is your best good won’t diminish the good of the whole. For instance, suddenly summer would have worldwide consequences in terms of food production, local consequences in terms of expectations and preparedness, and individual consequences on people’s body rhythms. No matter how much you might want summer, visualize summer, affirm summer and bless summer, it would be pretty hard to conceive of it as a general best good.

On the personal level, best good is never restricted, never limited by immediate and conditional circumstances. (Such as illness, poverty, loneliness, unemployment, etc.) Best good wants to soar, to expand, to be free. Change limiting emotions to expansive ones, and you get an expansive result. Have the courage to visualize and radiate best good, and miracles can happen.

Expansiveness, yes; excess, no. Excess tends to encourage negative behaviors such as greed, avarice, jealousy, intoxication, and control, and thus creates more harm than good.

Best good often looks different than you’d expect, mostly due to limitations of the imagination. Have the courage to accept best good if it shows up a form surprises you. Gracefully and gratefully welcome the unexpected.

5. Energize Your Intention

Give your intention a good, solid booster shot of happiness. Happiness enjoys, delights in, welcomes, enthuses, laughs with and blesses. Happiness doesn’t hold back. Happiness is perhaps the most amazingly huge, expansive power in the universe. Only love has as much constructive power. (Hate and anger are equally strong, but they destroy.)  Where love is the greatest healing power, happiness is the greatest creative power. Creative in terms of originating, building, generating, establishing, expanding, etc. While all emotions create a result, happiness is creation itself.

When you infuse an intention with happiness, you cannot get any result other than best good. Happiness and best good go together. Where you have happiness you have best good, and where you have best good you’ll find happiness. Happiness is not just an end, it’s the means to an end. Employ it as your means to your intention. Use it to energize what you want. The happier you are as you envision your best good, the faster your best good will come to you. A few ways to empower your intention with happiness include:

  • Open your senses and enjoy what you experience through them.
  • Stay present. Refuse to stew over the past or agonize over the future.
  • Detach from expectation; stay focused on best good.
  • Smile, play, laugh, celebrate.
  • Enjoy every aspect of the process, even the hard parts.

Happiness has the power to join you and your intention into a congruent whole. If you withhold happiness in any measure, you cannot integrate that aspect into the whole, and best good becomes almost good, or next-best good.

Happiness is not just a good idea, it’s an essential key.

Application

I’ve numbered these techniques solely for the sake of presentation. They are not a step-function or a hierarchy. Use them as appropriate to energize your courage. Internalize them to follow your path boldly. Master them to access ever expanding layers of your personal power.

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Empower Your Miracles

Sunday, February 27th, 2011

In the article Clarify Your Intention, I invited you to set an intention and formalize it as a statement. Part of the exercise was to identify those whom your intention would serve and to imagine how it would serve them. I believe when you add service to others, your intentions grow wings. Suddenly what you want is no longer grounded, no longer plodding along. Once in flight, it soars swiftly and easily into the miracle.

Service, at this miracle-level, is given without conditions, carries no judgment, and holds no expectations. You reach out to others, simply to help them along their way, to enrich their experiences, to empower them.

Giving and Receiving

One of the biggest obstacles to such simple service is thinking that what someone else wants conflicts with or obstructs what you want.

Say, for instance, you love the city life you’ve created, and your significant other wants to move into a cabin in the mountains. Or you want your daughter to go to college, and she wants to be a ski bum in the winter and write during the summer. Or you want to implement a new process at work and your boss doesn’t want anything to change. Or your neighbor supports gun control and you want to carry.

When your values, ideals, preferences and desires conflict with those of someone else, where does service come in?  You can’t even understand what they want; let alone support it.

It is, of course, important to stay true to your integrity, which may make such situations seem non-negotiable. Perhaps they are. How can you compromise on the second amendment, or not give your best at work, or let your daughter ruin her life, or uproot and leave friends and family for the sake of some mid-life crisis?

On the other hand – assuming miracle-making service is given without conditions, carries no judgment, and holds no expectations – what would happen if you removed any conditions you’ve imposed, stopped judging, and released your expectations?  What if you stepped outside your own agenda and chose to truly understand the other person’s position?

So, your husband wants to simplify and move to a cabin. You’ll have to set your own preferences aside in order to recognize his underlying motivations. Some of those reasons will be more obvious (and perhaps more acceptable to you) than others. It may be easy to understand the need to simplify, but can you empathize enough to actually feel the urge to live closer to nature, to detach from past paradigms, to go looking for something that’s been missing?

So, your daughter wants to ski and write. If you can set your agenda aside, you’ll have a better chance of recognizing her hunger for freedom, her creativity, her love of adventure, her determination to listen to her heart and find her own way. Where you see a college education as a good way to both knowledge and security, she may see it as a good way to erode her soul.

So, you want to innovate and your boss wants to stagnate. Do you know anything about his obligations?  Are you privy to the pressures from his investors, his board of directors, or his family’s traditions?   Can you appreciate his efforts to do the best he can with what he’s got?

So, you think your neighbor wants to ban all guns, wants stern laws and stiff penalties. Have you ever asked him what gun control means to him?  Have you ever listened to the reasons supporting his concerns?

Becoming neutral – exercising acceptance, empathy and compassion – is the first step toward service at the Creator level. (See The Power of Emotion.)

Mastering Your Emotions

The second step is to become the master of your own emotions

When you’re in conflict with someone else, you see your reasoning as logical and your arguments as valid. You are steadied by your facts and supported by your common sense. Naturally, you’re passionate about what’s right.

But what if your passion – and that of the other person – creates and maintains the conflict?  What if the factors of the situation are actually secondary?

When you deem your position to be right (or even just mostly right) and the other person’s position to be wrong, you are in Interpreter mode.

Consider again the above examples.

Perhaps you resist the idea of moving to the mountains because: the whole idea is scary and overwhelming, you resent that your feelings don’t get more consideration, you deplore the prospect of roughing it, you want to protect what you’ve already built, you believe your spouse is immersed in a temporary and unrealistic fantasy.

Perhaps you resist your daughter’s plan for her life because you’re anxious for her, you’re disappointed in her choices, you’re certain a college education is necessary. Maybe deep down you envy and resent her free-wheeling ways.

Perhaps you resist your boss’s inertia because you’re certain you know a better way, you’re frustrated your suggestions aren’t given more consideration, you’re irritated by his attitudes and fears, you long for more responsibility and recognition, you’re afraid at this rate you’ll soon be out of a job.

Perhaps your differences with your neighbor are only partly about guns. Sure you believe in the right to carry, and you think he’s naïve, his dog barks half the night and poops on your lawn, and half of his front yard is an unsightly, poorly-tended vegetable garden.

Such underlying emotions are all from Interpreter mode, and Interpreter emotions always produce struggle. And the more you struggle, the stronger the conflict grows.

If you’ve already dropped your conditions and released your expectation, if you’ve already chosen neutrality, you’re halfway there. From that place of calm it’s fairly easy to release any remaining Interpreter emotions. And when you refuse to indulge in interpreter mode habits, you access more of your own power.

You also ease others away from their Interpreter tendencies by not adding the fuel of your so-called “passion” to their fires.

Mastery comes as you practice consciously choosing Partner mode emotions instead. When you operate from Partner mode, you create cooperation instead of conflict. For instance:

Imagine how discussions of whether or not to move to the mountains would be different if you replaced fear with trust, resentment with affection, aversion with tranquility, frustration with harmony, and suspicion with respect.

Imagine how your relationship with your daughter would improve if you replaced anxiety with confidence, disappointment with admiration, certainty with respect, envy with contentment, and impatience with gratitude.

Imagine how your dissatisfactions at work would abate if you replaced frustration with eagerness, ambition with willingness, longing with tenacity, and fear with confidence.

Imagine how the tension between you and your neighbor would ease up if you replaced arrogance with friendliness, helplessness with amusement, hostility with patience, and vexation with recognition.

The higher you move on the scale of emotions, the more personal power you access and the more you become the master of your emotions. The more you master your emotions, the more wisdom and empowerment you bring to the situations of your life.

Whenever you bring wisdom and empowerment into any situation, you serve others as well as yourself. You serve by releasing tension, by shedding fresh and clear light on situations, by making some of your enlightenment available to others.

When you empower others through your understanding, acceptance, encouragement, cooperation, and love, you expand your influence, gain credibility, form alliances, broaden your base, and roll out the welcome mat. What you give to others comes back to you.

Partner emotions always result in cooperation. When you free yourself from conditions, judgments and expectation, you open the door to a far wider range of possibilities than exist in Interpreter mode. When you are in full mastery of Partner emotions, best good becomes probable. You become an agent in bringing about the best good of others. You provide extraordinary service when you take yourself out of someone else’s picture.

The Universal Whole

This expansive energy you now experience and generate also strengthens your connection, partnership and oneness with the universe. In Partner mode, it’s easy to trust the universe will support you and others at the same time. Conflicts dissolve in best good because almost always the best good of others is also your best good.

Consider these ways in which the universe partners with you:

1.    The universe never judges. Your outcomes result directly and inevitably from the energies you generate – your thoughts, your actions and your emotions. There is no score-keeper-in-the-sky recording on a tally sheet whether you’re good or bad, marking you down for “bad” choices and rewarding you for “good” ones.

2.    On the universal level there are no arbitrary or unstated conditions. The rulebook never changes. You get out according to what you put in, and that’s that.

3.    The universe is never disappointed in you, because the universe holds no expectations. You do what you do, and you experience the results of your choices. If the universe has any desires for you, they are for your growth, your joy, your well-being and your best good. There may be hope that you will receive these miracles, and there may be rejoicing when you do; nevertheless, there will always be love and encouragement when you don’t.

Does this partnership with the universe support you, empower you, serve you?

What if you supported, empowered, and served others, following this model?

When you extend to others what the universe extends to you, you help strengthen the universal whole. The more you serve in this way, the stronger you become. The more you expand your Partner and Creator influence, the more others will move to higher levels of calm, cooperation and oneness.

Service and The Modes of Power

As a quick review, consider that the way you serve reveals your mode of power.

If you subjugate yourself, you are in Victim mode. This subjugation can occur in two ways. You can cede your power to someone else. Or you can submit to the emotions themselves. Whether you let others control you or you let your emotions dominate you, you relinquish your self.

If you serve reluctantly, you are in Interpreter mode. Almost all emotions in this mode have a sub-context of reluctance. You give because you must, or should, or have ulterior motives. Sometimes you want to avoid pain; sometimes you strive to come out ahead through  manipulation. Often, if you could see another option, you’d take it.

If you detach your emotions from your service you are in Observer mode. Neutral service takes little energy on your part, feels optional, and promises no particular benefit – and not offering it carries no penalty. Such gentle service can be as simple as offering a smile to a stranger, making a joke to ease tension, or holding the door for someone.

If you cooperate, you are in Partner mode. Overt generosity requires an emotional investment. You consciously and mindfully open your heart and help the other person in a pro-active way. Your service might be physical, but it can as easily be thoughtful or emotional. You want the other person’s success, the other person’s growth, the other person’s happiness and wellness, without putting it in the context of your own success or happiness.

If you bless, empower and trust, you are in Creator mode. At this level you become one with the other person – even if you remain in disagreement. You become one with the universe in sustaining and facilitating. You easily and effortlessly invest peace, love and joy in their efforts. You trust the other person’s best good as you trust your own.

Serve and Soar

Every worthy intention benefits someone else. As you align yourself with the miracle you have chosen to manifest, incorporate service into your efforts and watch those efforts take flight.

Service always imbues intention with greater power and swifter attainment.

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Mindfulness

Sunday, February 20th, 2011

Consider the ways in which thoughts, actions and emotions are the three powerful and creative energies of your life.

You know all about actions, those physical things you do with your body.  You know thoughts motivate and move you in certain directions.  And you experience every day the power your emotions have on your moods, your relationships and the state of your health.  When you bring these three forces – actions, thoughts, and emotions – into one congruent whole, when you live intentionally, you open the way for miracles.

These three forces always interact to create a result.  They must.  There is no alternative.

When you are aware and focused, these aspects of yourself create what you want and bring it into existence.

However, even when you are unaware, incongruent, and living by accident, these three energies interact to create a result.  They are your life forces, and they strive to satisfy your desires.  The trouble is, if you think you want one thing, yearn emotionally for something else, and act in favor of something else again, these forces become conflicted and bring turmoil to your life.  For instance, if you are in a difficult, combative relationship with someone (or something), at some level you have injected combative energy into that relationship.

On the other hand, in the smooth, easy, cooperative relationships of your life, your thoughts, actions and emotions are unified with love, generosity, confidence, and oneness – and that’s what you receive.

Putting in; Getting out

What you put in creates what comes out. If you want to know what you’re putting in, look at what’s coming out.

Assume there is an area or two of your life in which you’d like to get a different result.  You know you need to put something else in, but you’re not sure what you need to change.

Sometimes it helps to come at this challenge from a different angle, so consider using different words:

Action   =   Doing

Thoughts   =   Having

Emotions   =   Being

In your experience, which comes first?  Do you do, in order to have, in order to be?

That’s the typical order for most people.  For instance:

  • You want a loving, intimate relationship.  Obviously, you’ve got to do – meet people, go on dates, get to know someone, make peace with the person you’re with.  Then you can have – a boy friend/girl friend/significant other.  And then you can be in a satisfying relationship.
  • You want wealth.  You can easily come up with a list of things to do – get the right degree, start investing, initiate a savings plan, market more effectively, etc.  These actions enable you to have – credentials, the right job, something to start investing with, a larger base.  Then you can be rich.
  • You want to be at the top of your game.  You review the actions of those who have gone before – study, practice, learn, network, perform, create a business plan.  Through hard work you can have – skills, finesse, contacts, a product.  And then you will be among the best.

This is the obvious, common sense, Western-culture way to approach anything you want to achieve.

For Better Results

The miracle way works in the opposite, counter-intuitive direction.

To make miracles, be first, then have, and leave doing for last.  For this radical approach to make sense, we have to redefine the terms just a bit.

Doing is about taking action; it’s also about partnering – especially with the universe.  Of course you must focus, learn, practice, implement, etc.  That’s your part.  To accept the universe as your partner, you must also welcome, attract, be willing, agree, appreciate, honor, etc.

Because we’re associating having with thoughts, let’s look at it as having the mental resources you want to possess:  knowledge, abilities, skills, qualities of character, attitudes, beliefs, insights, wisdom, etc. (Basically, what you might be able to take with you when you die.)

Being refers to being in your personal power, and that’s determined by your emotional state.  How you feel is how you are.  Whatever your emotional state, that emotion resonates throughout your entire being, and then it vibrates outward.  These outward vibrations affect everyone and everything they touch.  They are the power you generate, just as the sun generates the power of heat and light.

Now let’s put this in the context of real life, using the above examples.

If you want a loving, intimate relationship.

  • Identify what kind of person do you want to be in this relationship – loving, generous, kind, happy, considerate, neat,  adventurous.  (It might help to look at what kind of person you were in past relationships and review how that worked for you.)
  • What you want to have may include:  attitudes, such as patience, good sense of humor, confidence, compassion; skills and abilities, such as communication, tenderness, better organization, scuba-diving; beliefs, such as that you are loving and lovable?
  • Lastly, what can you do to further the above?  Practice, put yourself out there, stop arguing, release fear, go dancing, buy gear. laugh more, believe it’s possible?  Receive?  Welcome?

If you want wealth/abundance.  Ask yourself the same questions:

  • Determine the kind of person you want to be: confident, generous, willing, open, aggressive, optimistic?
  • What you want to have may include:  attitudes, such as an expansive outlook, honesty, generosity, attentiveness; skills, such as financial knowledge, market acumen, better proficiency in your field; and what you need to believe, such as money is your friend, or money is easy, or you are aligned with prosperity.
  • Finally, what can you do to further the above?  Study, practice, bless your work, network?  Receive?  Appreciate?  Attract?

If you want to be at the top of your game.

  • What kind of person will you have to be? Confident, respectful, determined, productive, willing, optimistic, humble?
  • What attitudes will it serve you to have? Serenity, tenacity, respect, excellence?  Wisdom?  What skills will you have to acquire?  Subject knowledge, proficiency, insight?  What belief will serve you?  That your abilities are a divine gift?
  • What can you do to further the above?  Study, practice, perform, write, invite challenges, give it away?  Welcome?  Nurture?

Put it on Paper

Take a piece of paper, and write your intention statement across the top. (See Living With Intention) Take a minute to feel that intention.  Imagine it as real, as a done deal, as manifested in your life.

Draw a grid with three columns and three rows below your intention statement.  Label the columns Be, Have, Do.  Label the Rows Today, This Week, This Month.  Because you’re probably in the habit of thinking of what to do first, I suggest you start with the far right column – Do – and work your way left.

The first row of the worksheet is labeled Today.  In the Do square at the far right, identify what you can to today to further your intention.

An intention I’m working on currently is:  With enthusiasm and gratitude I welcome and receive money in a steady, abundant flow.  I love money and it loves me.

I filled in the Do-Today square of my grid with:

  • Blog
  • Welcome 3 new clients.
  • Personally invite people into my manifestation workshop
  • Refuse my habitual distractions

In the Have-Today square, I wrote:

  • Peace
  • Wisdom
  • Love
  • Enthusiasm
  • Money
  • Clients
  • Greater sense of purpose

In the Be-Today square, I’ve identified:

  • Serene
  • Confident
  • Attentive
  • Spiritually magnetic
  • Willing
  • Enthusiastic
  • Happy

Clearly, blogging is a physical function – a do.  My part is to sit at my computer, think, compose, post.  I partner with the universe by inviting wisdom and insight. (Also by inviting clients and students.)

In order to welcome, invite, attract, and serve, I must have peace. Having peace about money right now is a bit challenging because my bank account is pretty slim, but just performing this exercise brought a surprising level of serenity.  Much of having, as I wrote last week, is just getting out of your own way.

Which brings me to being.  Being serene helps me have peace.  Being willing and receptive opens the door so abundance can come into my life.  Being attentive helps me have focus, so I can do the next thing that comes up for me to do – receive.

In coming up with your program, I advise starting at the right and working left.  When you want to implement your program, I encourage you to start at the left and work right.  Remember, the only time frame for implementation is today.

Now consider the coming week.  When you expand your time horizon just that much, what changes?  Again, think from right to left; implement from left to right.

Here’s my program for the week:

Be:

  • Confident
  • Serene
  • Attentive
  • Generous
  • Conscientious
  • Happy

Have:

  • Commitment
  • Consistency
  • Focus
  • Love
  • Enthusiasm
  • Wisdom
  • Confidence
  • Money

Do:

  • Post blog
  • Welcome 6 new clients
  • Receive students in the new manifestation workshops.
  • Attract enough money to pay my rent.

When I’m looking at seven days rather than one, I can come up with more things to do. To get it all done, I’m going to consciously have more going on within me.  Which means I have to be at a higher level of my personal power.

Now, project forward for one month.  What can you do during the next thirty days to further your intention?  In order to accomplish all that, what qualities will you choose to have (adopt, improve, be open to, focus on)?  And what emotions (mode of power) will you generate, operate from, be?

Here is my plan for the coming month:

Be:

  • Serene
  • Happy
  • Enthusiastic
  • Generous
  • Sure
  • Open
  • One
  • Productive

Have:

  • Wisdom
  • Receptiveness
  • Willingness
  • Creativity
  • Empathy
  • Focus
  • Abundance

Do:

  • Organize thinking for next book.
  • Work with 15 clients per week.
  • Post weekly blogs.
  • Open the floodgates of abundance.

Once you’ve aligned your actions, thoughts, and emotions on paper, begin by letting the emotions expand within you, then focus your thoughts, and finally, act accordingly.

In past blogs I’ve made the point that what is up to you, while how is up to the universe.  Unifying your life forces, however, is as aspect of how that belongs to you.  Only you can choose how you will feel, how you will think, and how you will act.  Only you can decide who you will be, what you will have, and what you will do.

(Note: I wrote and published this article in 2009.  I am happy to report my prosperity intention is smoothly and delightfully coming to fruition.)

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Becoming Congruent

Sunday, February 6th, 2011

As sentient beings, we approach everything from three directions at once.  We view them through our emotions, we think about them, and we act – not necessarily in that order.

Our best results come when these three tactics work in harmony with each other, when we’re congruent.  In fact, you can recognize the areas of your life where you are congruent by looking at your results.  If you’re getting what you want, you’re in alignment.  If you’re not getting what you want, one of these forces doesn’t mesh with the other two.

Alignment begins by making sure what you want is true for you and that you can be true to it.  Your congruence with what you want is the first step of alignment, but sometimes being true to what you want can be challenging.  Even when it feels true and you know it comes from your heart, you’re beset by doubts or objections or experiences that deny the possibility of attainment.  Then it’s time to search out your impediments and remove them from your path.

Identify the Impurities

For a good way to I way to identify your obstacles and objections here’s something I call The “But” Exercise.

Write your intention at the top of a piece of paper.  For instance,

With delight and gratitude I enjoy unrestrained financial abundance.

Then turn your statement into a compound sentence with the word but, and finish with whatever fear, belief, or doubt comes up.  Since you probably have more than one fear or doubt, repeat this exercise at least 10 different ways.

If you’ve been working with an intention statement on a daily basis, it’s very likely some objections have been intruding.  This is your chance to commit them to paper:

With delight and gratitude I enjoy unrestrained financial abundance,

  • But I’m stuck in a job that barely pays the bills.
  • But every time I try to feel abundance my stomach tightens up.
  • But the economy’s so bad, where would any new money come from.
  • But I’m farther in the hole than I’ve ever been before.
  • But money is the root of all evil.
  • But the rich only get that way on the backs of the poor.
  • But I have to make sure everyone else is okay first.

If you discover more than ten obstacles, keep going.  Perhaps you know your strongest doubt already, so it comes up first.  Continue anyway just to probe for anything else.  If you’re not sure what’s stopping you, this is a good way to release your subconscious.  Maybe you’ve got such an array of doubts you could find twenty without batting an eye.  However it is for you, this is the first step toward dissolving your objections and becoming completely congruent with your intention.

This exercise may take some time.  You may need to come back to it a couple of times.  Stay open and receptive.  You may discover some old beliefs embedded in your subconscious.  You may be able to articulate a persistent fear.  You may be confronted by an attitude or opinion that surprises you.  Write them all down.  If you resist your resistance, you give your obstacles permission to block you.

Now, with your list in hand, read through the buts and select the one you perceive to be the strongest.  Which one do you believe hinders you the most?

Dissolve the Obstacles

And now, dissolve the obstruction.  For clarity’s sake, I’m going to number the “steps,” although in practice they often overlap.

1.  Write your complete, compound statement on a fresh piece of paper (your original intention and the but you’ve decided to dissolve).

With delight and gratitude I enjoy unrestrained financial abundance, but the rich only get that way on the backs of the poor.

2.  Examine your statement for implications and connotations and take note of what you find.  There’s quite a lot embedded in this example, including disdain for the rich (and a reluctance to become one of them), fear of becoming manipulative and exploitive, and identification with the poor.  Your own statement may be equally loaded.

3.      Consider what you would like to believe instead.  Perhaps you already consciously accept something else, even while your subconscious holds onto an attitude or belief that clearly doesn’t serve you.  You might find it helpful to think of neutralizing the old belief.

  • I can be rich and loving at the same time.
  • Some of the richest people in the world are also the most generous.
  • Money is merely a form of energy, and all energy can be used for either good or bad.
  • Creative endeavors produce as much wealth (perhaps more) than exploitive endeavors.
  • While exploitation exaggerates the difference between rich and poor, cooperation benefits everyone.

4.      Work with your list to come up with a statement of belief that strongly replaces the old one:

I cooperate with and empower others in every way, and we all prosper.

5.      Envision this as true.  Feel it as true.  Let it expand within you until you can observe your supportive and prosperous relationships with everyone.  What emotions come up for you?  What emotions do you think would most actively create this?  Love?  Delight?  Enjoyment?  Gratitude?  Serenity?  Generosity?

Remember, all emotions are creative.  You create according to the emotions you experience and generate.  Whereas Victim emotions create pain and suffering and Interpreter emotions create struggle, Observer emotions create calm, Partner emotions create opportunity and Creator emotions connect with your best good.

If some latent Victim emotion continues to reside within you, no matter how illogical or convoluted, that emotion retains the power to block what you want.  However, it’s impossible for any Victim emotion to reside in the same space as any Creator emotion.  You can neutralize fear, hate, anger, jealousy, etc. with love, kindness, peace, joy, etc.  Always.

To eradicate Victim or Interpreter obstacles, identify an emotion one step up the chart and choose to feel it instead.  Then identify an emotions one step up from that and adopt that one.  Keep going until you can access one of the Partner or Creator emotions.  Then incorporate one or more of those emotions into this new statement.

I lovingly cooperate with others and generously empower them, and we all prosper.


6.    Now replace your original but with and to form a new compound statement.

With delight and gratitude I enjoy unrestrained financial abundance, and I lovingly cooperate with others and generously empower them, and we all prosper.

Align

Your new compound sentence may sound a bit cumbersome.  When you recognize the parts of your statement and their importance, you can abridge the statement while retaining the power of it.  Your statement encompasses the following:

1.    What you want. In the example I’m using, this is abundance.  Yours might be an improved relationship, greater health, a successful business, wholeness, making a living with your talent.

2.    Why you want it or the service you’ll provide. The example circumvents the belief that when some win others lose and focuses on win-win.  Your motives can be personal or broad.  If your own peace of mind is more important to you than world peace, focus on your own peace of mind.

3.    The emotion(s) you’ll use to create what you want.  In the example, the emotions are delight, gratitude and love.  Yours might be peace, enthusiasm, vigor, or anything from Partner or Creator mode.

By understanding these parts, you can sit with your intention without using any words at all:  imagine what you want, evoke the creative emotions, feel it as a done deal.   It’s impossible to know when or in what manner your intention will manifest, so relax and observe.

I provide one-on-one coaching in Personal Power and Manifestation.  Please write to me at kathy@kathyjacobson.com

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Posted in Congruence, Creator Mode, Interpreter Mode, Observer Mode, Partner Mode, The Law of Attraction, Victim Mode, intentions, manifestation | 7 Comments »

Expand Your Possibilities

Monday, January 3rd, 2011

As you will recall from the Diamond of Mastery diagram, Observer mode spans the waistline of the diamond, where it’s widest, where the possibilities are broadest.  This wealth of possibilities is the most important aspect of Observer mode.  Observer mode emotions produce calm, and only in calmness do possibilities become visible.

In this infinite universe, an infinite array of possibilities always exists.  (Imagine the wide part of the diamond as greater than your arm span rather than narrower than the paper.)  When you look around objectively you can observe myriad results:  people in all states of physical well-being, from deathly ill to vibrantly healthy; people in all states of abundance, from abject poverty to wealth in the mega-billions; people in all states of mental well-being, from despair to bliss; people in all states of service, from saving lives to rejecting others.  Whatever you want, you’ll find examples of people at both ends of the spectrum and everything in between.

Of course, someone caught in Victim mode – at the bottom tip of the diamond – sees no options, no alternatives, only more of the same.  Someone who has advanced to Interpreter mode can see a much wider range of options, but those options will all be cloaked in difficulty because Interpreter mode emotions produce struggle.

The move from Interpreter mode into Observer mode is like stepping from darkness into light.  Suddenly you have greater depth perception, details are clearer, peripheral vision expands, colors are sharper.  Suddenly you see a greatly expanded range of possibilities.

The key to this change is calm. Calmness of thought, calmness of emotion, calmness of action.  I like to think of this as the triumvirate of mind, heart and body.  These three aspects of self work together to produce results.  When they are unified, they generate whatever they are aligned with; when they are in conflict, they generate chaos.

Because thoughts, emotions and actions are so connected and interdependent, it’s possible to begin with any one of them to achieve calm.  In other posts, I’ve focused almost entirely on emotions, so let’s start there.

Calm Your Emotions

You can use any of the techniques I’ve suggested before to calm your emotions.  Here are four more:

  • Smile.  Using MRI, researchers have discovered that turning up the corners of the mouth changes the way the synapses in the brain fire.  Just by smiling, you move your brain activity to a happier location of the brain.
  • See beauty.  Notice something you believe to be beautiful and savor it.  Seeing beauty is like seeing truth, except on the emotional level.  Enjoying the beautiful will ease your heart away from any agitation and cool heated emotions.
  • Be silly.  Stick out your tongue, wiggle your butt, dance a jig, cross your eyes – let down your defenses.  To be silly for even a few moments will helps you transcend any tension-causing rules that bind you to beliefs and behaviors that may not be true for you.
  • Evoke a neutral emotion.  Basically, this is letting go of judgment and becoming the observer.  That transition moves you from stress to serenity

When you calm your heart, you also calm your body and your mind.

Calm Your Body

Releasing stress and tension from your body is often the preferred starting place, probably because physical tension is so easy to identify.  Chances are, if you took a quick inventory of your body right now you’d find tension somewhere; and chances are equally high your mind immediately comes up with a relaxation technique:  get a massage, exercise, practice yoga, have an acupuncture treatment, take an aspirin, stretch, go for a walk, meditate.  These are all effective methods for tension relief.  Here are additional ways to quiet your body.

  • Breathe deeply.  Inhale slowly into your diaphragm, paying attention to the air all the way in and all the way out.  Be with your body.  Repeat 4-6 times.  The body relaxes with such regulated and increased oxygenation.
  • Open your senses.  Pay attention to what you can hear, what you can see, what you can smell, what you can taste, and/or what you can feel.  Your senses are your access to the world, and compared to your own stress, the world is very stable.
  • Be in nature.  Go outside and be open to temperature, weather, plants, animals, and your body’s responses.  Nature is generous, inspiring, settling and calming.
  • Expand your body from within.  Become tall, lengthen your neck, broaden your shoulders, expand your rib cage, lengthen your arms and legs, stretch your skin.  When your body is tight, it hoards tense emotions; when your body is expanded, it welcomes generous emotions.

When you calm your body, you also calm your heart and your mind.

Calm Your Mind

Buddhism refers to mental anxiety as “monkey mind.”  Sometimes when the mind is particularly agitated, you may reach calm fastest through the body or the emotions.  However, the following suggestions can help you calm your mind first.

  • Count your blessings.  Think of five things you’re thankful for and savor them.  Especially be mindful to the blessings and advantages you enjoy that you didn’t earn.  Appreciation of what’s good switches the mind off something you might be judging negatively.
  • Laugh out loud.  Chuckle, giggle, tee-hee.  Generate it from your belly, your chest, your throat, your nose, your toes.  Just find some form of laughter inside of you and let it come out your mouth.  Laughter is a very effective medicine.
  • See truth.  Think of something you know to be true.  Even small truths work well here:  The sun is shining (or it’s raining); I love my dog (or my child, or my spouse), I am well-fed (or hungry), I like ice cream (or swimming, or a good book, or martinis).  Truth will help you stop any story your mind might be spinning.
  • Be present.  Take note of whatever you are doing.  If you are eating, savor every bite; if you are working, focus on the task; if you are walking, observe the roll of your feet, the resilience of the ground, the sounds and textures of the environment.  Focus your mind on what is, and you will find ease from whatever story your brain is making up.

When you calm your mind, you also calm your heart and your body.

Calm = Possibilities

Okay, now that you’re calm, let’s explore what’s possible.

At the center top of a piece of paper, briefly identify something you want to create.  I’ve used the following example in previous blogs:

With delight and gratitude I enjoy unrestrained financial abundance.

Immediately below your intention, write the first result that comes to mind.  Perhaps the first result of financial abundance would be, I’m totally out of debt. Below that, imagine two new possibilities that would derive from the first, moving in two different directions:  One way:  I have money to spare. The other way:  I have money to share. Now let each of those options move in two more directions, so you have branched into four further possibilities:  1) My business is prospering beyond by wildest dreams. 2) Money comes when I need it. 3) My prosperity prospers others. 4) I help those I love to my heart’s content.

From here, let the ideas come from wherever they will, even if they don’t logically progress from earlier ideas.  Let your intuition guide you.  Give you imagination free rein.  Expand your possibilities in one direction today, and expand them in another direction tomorrow.  No buts.  No boundaries.  No rules.  No limitations.

Keep ‘em Coming

Just as there is an infinite expanse of possibilities out there waiting to be noticed, you have an infinite creative potential for conceiving, receiving, exploring, and discovering.  Your subconscious mind loves to come up with ideas.  Unfortunately, most people find it easier to shut down their creativity than encourage it.  Perhaps you’ve developed the habit of saying, “Whoa!”  “Not now!”  “Not yet!”  No way!”  “Can’t do it.”  Here’s a good way to reverse that practice.

Keep a notebook called “My Idea Log.”  Write your Intention Statement at the top of one of the pages.  (Perhaps you are working with many intentions, so each one will have a page – or a section – in your notebook.)  Whenever you have an idea related to your intention, write it in the log.  This will be a running brainstorming session, and the same rules apply:  Everything gets written down.  No judging.  No discussion.  No cross talk.  No sorting or organizing.  Allow repetition.  Encourage the far-out.  Write down everything that comes to mind.

Perhaps most of the things you write down will be about how, at least at first.  Writing them in the Idea Log serves the following purposes:

1.    You signal your subconscious that you’re listening, and this encourages more and more ideas.

2.    By noting your how ideas on paper, yet staying intentionally focused on the what, you strengthen your partnership with the universe.  In essences you affirm your understanding that what is up to you, and you trust the universe to handle how.

3.    When it comes time for you to take action, you’ll have an amazing source of ideas already at hand.

Remember, the possibilities are without end.  The calmer you are, the more vividly you will see an ever-expanding range of options – most of which are already sitting right under your nose.

For personal one-on-one coaching, please contact me email me: kathy@kathyjacobson.com


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Posted in Calmness, Interpreter Mode, Neutrality, Observer Mode, Possibilities, Victim Mode, manifestation | 2 Comments »

Pacifying Your Objections

Sunday, December 19th, 2010

When I first realized the power of emotions, I thought of them as prayers.  (Or wishes, or desires, or intentions, or choices.)  I saw happiness as a prayer for more happiness, and misery as a prayer for more misery.  Then I began to also see thoughts as prayers and actions as prayers.  For the past fifteen years, my observations have affirmed and expanded that original idea, and I have come to see the power of combining these three energies into a congruent whole

Congruence Produces Results

When thoughts, actions and emotions are joined toward something, that something results.  This is true whether the result is something you want or something you don’t want.

For most people, most of the time, results occur more by accident than by intention.  For instance, you probably have no intention to catch the cold bug that happens to be going around.  But if you have the thought/belief that illnesses are passed by germs, the emotion/acceptance that you’re vulnerable, and an action/contact with those germs, you’ll be congruent about catching cold.  You can easily catch it by accident.

The recognition of congruence is easy when what you have is what you like, enjoy, delight in, appreciate, love, or are at peace with.  It’s much more difficult to acknowledge a potential alignment with the troubling aspects of life – conflicts, illnesses, hardships, frustrations, lacks, etc.

When you look at what you don’t like in your life, perhaps you experience dislike, frustration, impatience, grief, fear, anger, or some other emotions from Victim or Interpreter mode.  It’s natural to wonder how you can possibly be aligned with something you so passionately don’t want.  It isn’t necessary to dissect or analyze the experiences of your past for the answer.  Simply look at your results and the energy that produces those results.  Are you suffering?  The energy of Victim mode emotions produces suffering.  Are you struggling?  The energy of Interpreter mode emotions produces struggle.

Remember, all emotions have power.  All thoughts have power.  And all actions have power.  Everything in your life indicates these three powers are pulling together in the same direction – or in conflict with each other.  If you change any one of the three, you will get a different result.

Today we’re going to do a little time traveling in order to de-energize what you don’t want – and energize what you do want.

In my previous blog (Becoming Congruent), I suggested a “But” exercise.  From that exercise, you’ll notice past experiences tend to be at the heart of many of your buts. Not all, of course.  Some will have to do with your current circumstances, and a few will reach into the future.  Take a moment to review your list and mark which is which.  Mark those rooted in the past with P, those centered in the present with C (for Current), and those projecting into the future with F.

To illustrate, here’s the sample intention I used last week.  I labeled long-held beliefs with P because such beliefs tend to have such deep roots into the past.

With delight and gratitude I enjoy unrestrained financial abundance, but:

  • I’m stuck in a job that barely pays the bills. (C)
  • Every time I try to feel abundance my stomach tightens up. (C)
  • The economy’s so bad, where would any new money come from? (F)
  • I’m farther in the hole than I’ve ever been before. (C)
  • Money is the root of all evil. (P)
  • The rich only get that way on the backs of the poor. (P)
  • I have to make sure everyone else is okay first. (P)

Change the Past

In science fiction, one of the primary challenges of time travel is to not interfere with history.  One little change in the past could completely obliterate the present as you know it.  For instance, what would happen to you if one set of your great-great grandparents didn’t conceive your great grandparent?  Or what would your childhood have been like if your father did different work?  Or what would your current situation be if you’d gone to a different school?

Look at your but list and choose one of those you marked with a P.  What if one little thing had been different in the past?  Would that but have the same power?

To change the past in a positive way, you will travel back in time and “rewrite” the event that originated the but, or influenced it, or reinforced it.  While there may be no mechanism to travel through time physically, metaphysically you can revisit your past and powerfully re-create your current reality.

Here’s one of the buts from the above list:  But I have to make sure everyone else is okay first.

Beliefs such as this may have resulted from a single event, but more likely they take shape through repetition.  The seed may have been planted when you were forced to share your toys, nurtured at functions (including your own birthday parties) where guests were served first, cultivated when you were instructed to watch out for your little brothers and sisters, etc. until you came to believe other people’s needs take precedence over your own.

Using the but you selected from your own list, travel back in time to a situation from the past that reinforced your belief.  It doesn’t matter if the situation actually happened or is simply representative.  It does matter that you can re-experience the feelings of the situation.  Also, the more meditative and experiential you can become, the better.  You’ll be moving through the situation emotionally, and you’ll control the clock so you can stop the action at any time.

Begin by letting your memory travel back to the situation you have in mind.  Imagine yourself at the beginning of the scene, when your emotions were in the neutral-to-happy range.  Say you’re happily playing by yourself with your toys when another child arrives.  Or you’ve just finished blowing out the candles on your cake and it’s time to serve it to your guests.  Or you’ve been left in charge of your cute little sister.

Now let the scene unfold until the moment when your needs or wants get pushed into the back seat.  Stop the clock.  Recognize this a choice point for you.

Of course, back in the past you couldn’t know you had a choice.  You were young, you were still forming your world view, you were vulnerable.  You couldn’t orchestrate the situation to please yourself.  (Violators will be prosecuted!)  Yet you felt something.

Start the clock and move through the scene just long enough to recognize what you felt then:  angry, frustrated, guilty, belittled, miserable, resentful, helpless, bitter, defensive, ashamed?  Stop the clock again.

With the clock stopped, acknowledge your emotion as one from Victim or Interpreter mode.  From your current wisdom you know Victim mode emotions result in pain and suffering; Interpreter mode emotions result in struggle.  The emotion you experienced then has been affecting your life ever since.  So, since you’re traveling back in time, now’s your chance to change the past.  And since you’ve stopped the clock and can pause it for as long as you want, take the time to decide how you would like to react instead.  Emotions from Observer mode will neutralize the old belief, Partner emotions will generate new opportunities, and Creator emotions will produce best good.

When you know the emotion you want to experience instead, choose it.  Generate it within you.  Feel it.  Let this be the mode you operate from.  Now start the clock again.

As you let the scene continue, the other players will try to follow the old script.  But when you use your chosen emotion to motivate new dialogue and responses, they will have to follow your lead and adapt to your new choices.  Pay attention to what happens within yourself as the scene plays out.  Notice any shifts that occur.

In science fiction, any changes to the past usually occur within the characters, with no permanent changes to history.  (Except they may have fixed something that had broken.)  When the characters return to their present, it’s often to the present they knew before, but they themselves have gained a measure of enlightenment.  In your reality, you will probably experience a similar inner transformation, and that inner transformation will impact your current circumstances.  You will have changed the past in one small way, and that change will also change the present.

Choose the Present

For this technique, return to your but list and select an item you identified with an C for Current:  But I’m farther in the hole than I’ve ever been before. Compared to changing the past, choosing the present is fairly straightforward, although it requires the same meditative and experiential attention.

  1. Identify the emotion(s) most entangled with this very present but.  For instance, my example may generate insecurity.  (Ah, I’m feeling insecure.)
  2. Recognize the creative power of the emotion you’ve been experiencing.  (Insecurity about money makes me feel sick to my stomach.)
  3. Acknowledge your power to choose your emotions.  (Oh my, I’ve been choosing to feel insecure.)
  4. Decide what you’d rather feel, what would be an antidote for insecurity.  (Hope.  I want to feel hopeful.)
  5. Relax into what you want to feel instead.  This step requires conscious willingness to replace the old habitual emotion with the new intentional emotions.
  6. Choose to operate from that new space.

When you replace insecurity with hope you move from Interpreter mode to Observer mode, and you will experience calm.  If you choose a Partner mode emotion, such as gratitude or eagerness or tranquility, new and unexpected opportunities will open up for you.  If you choose a Creator emotion such as delight or peace or optimism, your best good will unfold.

Connect with the Future.

You already travel into the future to create the present.  When your time machine is powered by Partner or Creator emotions, your visits empower your congruence with all that you enjoy and appreciate in your life.  When your time machine is powered by Victim or Interpreter emotions, you strengthen your congruence with those things you passionately dislike.

This technique will help you become more intentional about using the future to become more congruent with what you do want.

Most likely, when you look at the but statements you’ve labeled with an (F) for Future, you’ll find fear or worry.  In my example:  The economy’s so bad, where would any new money come from? Embedded in this are the Interpreter emotions of self-doubt, trepidation, worry, anxiety, and also a bit of helplessness from the anger and woe of Victim.

Such emotions make the future look dark and dismal, and if you draw such fear from the future into the present, the present becomes dark and dismal.  Even if today is bright and sunny and you have money in the bank and work scheduled on the books, you may find it impossible to enjoy any security in the now.  In other words, you’re using the future to create the present.

Imagine the time continuum between the present and the future as an assembly line belt.  The belt runs continuously, forward from you into the future and from the future back to you.  The now-emotion you put on the belt scrolls into the future, and the future scrolls the result back to you now.  Because this is a continuously running loop, the emotion you put on the belt determines your future and your present.

To try this, select one of your (F) but statements:  The economy’s so bad, where would any new money come from?

Review your intention statement.  Perhaps you’ve already selected an emotion or two to energize this intention:  With delight and gratitude I enjoy unrestrained financial abundance.

Generate the emotions of delight and gratitude within you.  Let the energy of them circulate through your body. Feel them.  Be them.  Let them expand within you and radiate from you.  Put them on the conveyor belt and send them into the future.

Now, receive what the future puts on the conveyor belt and returns to you.

Congruence is Power

There is no one way to become congruent, to align with what you want.  Sometimes it’s a process of dismantling or deconstructing.  Sometimes it requires release or surrender.  Sometimes all you have to do is become willing and welcoming.  Sometimes it involves practice or assembly.  Regardless of the ways or means of becoming aligned, when your thoughts, actions and emotions form a single, congruent prayer in unity with what you want, what you want must result.  And the results are often immediate.  When those three aspects of your power click together into a congruent whole, the miracle happens.  (The final result may take a little time.  You probably won’t loose those 20 pounds instantly.)

If the miracle hasn’t happened yet, stay mindful of your congruence.

For one-on-one coaching to create a new reality, please email me directly:  kathy@kathyjacobson.com

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Posted in Choice, Congruence, Making Miracles, intentions, manifestation, personal power | 2 Comments »

Clarify Your Intention

Sunday, December 5th, 2010

Consider the difference between willfulness and willingness.  Willfulness is filled with determination, urgency and control, and is an expression of force.  By contrast, willingness is filled with acceptance, partnership and welcome, and is an expression of power.  Personal power.

For an intention to have power, it must be true for you and you must be willing to be true to it.  The truth of an intention often becomes clearer as the intention itself becomes clearer.  As you understand an intention more fully, you often understand yourself more fully.  Greater understanding tends to strengthen your willingness to receive what you want.

I once worked with a client who wanted to manifest an intimate relationship.  She’d been alone for a while, and she had a busy, full life, and she’d decided she wanted a partner to share it with.

We spent most of the coaching session focusing on what that would look like to her and how it would feel, and then I asked, “If a fabulous guy knocked on your door tomorrow and said, ‘Here, I am,’ would you say, “Come right on in, I’m excited to have you become part of my life.”  My client look a moment or two to imagine it, then shook her head.  “No, I don’t think I would.”

When she looked truly at her heart she realized she wasn’t willing to change her life, even to accommodate a loving, intimate relationship.

Wanting What You Want

Manifestation is as easy as, “Ask and you shall receive.”  The missing element of that promise is:  “Unless you want something else more.”  Almost always, when you want something and can’t seem to make it happen, you’re resistant at some level.

Want can also mean not wanting: not wanting change, not wanting to take a risk, not wanting to look too deeply within, not wanting to be different, not wanting to challenge old beliefs, etc.

Fear of the unknown is probably the strongest form of resistance, and such fears are often so deeply buried they’re difficult to identify.  What if success changes the structure of your relationship?  What if you fail?  What if something takes more time or energy or resources than you bargained for.  What if you can’t even see around the first bend, let alone all the way to the finish line?

Following are some ways to strengthen your willingness to receive what you want.  They help you assess what pulls you in that direction.

Define Your Terms

In a previous blog, I invited you to create an intention statement.   Such statements don’t have to be specific or detailed.  You probably have a general sense of what the words you’ve chosen mean to you.  Or maybe you only sort of know what you mean.  Take a few minutes to dig into what the  words and phrases you’re using truly mean to you.  If you want to write a best-selling novel, what does “best-selling” mean to you?  If you want work that provides a good income, does “good income” mean a specific dollar figure or a level of comfort or a degree of security?  If you want greater inner peace, what does peace look like to you?

Do this with each part of your statement.  If you’ve referred to the way your intention will benefit others, what do you mean?  Perhaps you want to heal others.  Does that mean by laying on of hands or by helping them make healthier choices?  Perhaps you want to empower others.  What does their empowerment look like to you?  Perhaps you want to provide a good time through your music or your stories.  Does that mean you’re a catalyst for fun?  Pleasure?  Escape?  Laughter?

By clarifying what you mean, you strengthen your partnership with your subconscious and with the universe.  When you say/think/pray that word or phrase, there’s no ambiguity, it becomes a shorthand communication.  You know exactly what you mean.  You don’t have to remind yourself that “abundance” means a million dollars (or a steady flow of money or freedom from want, or confidence about money rather than fear).  The images of fulfillment follow naturally, and the clarity you have established provides an adhesive so that with repetition and focus your intention grows bigger and stronger.  As fulfillment expands within you, all the forces involved also focus and strengthen to bring about your best good according to your own definition.

Connect With Your Values

You have acquired your personal values system as a result of many influencing factors throughout your life.  Some of them came from the beliefs and practices of your family, some from your religious or spiritual training, and some from your culture and education.  For instance, from your family you may value thrift, order, togetherness, hard work, etc.  From your religion, you may value charity, obedience, compassion, etc.  From your education, you may value knowledge and challenge; from your culture, etiquette and respect.  Of course, from those same sources you may have realized you couldn’t adopt the values of others.  You may value freedom more than obedience, independence more than unity, creativity more than compliance, achievement more than good manners.

From among your assortment of values, identify those that support your desires.  The values you have adopted and live by reflect what’s true for you.  Therefore, if your intention is true for you, your values will support it.  Identify the principles and ideals that reflect and confirm your intention.

Say for instance you’ve decided to manifest financial abundance, and to you that means an income two or three times greater than you’re currently earning.  Say your parents held a strong value for hard work and believed money is honorable only if earned by the sweat of your brow.  But you want to write a book.  No manual labor involved.  You may not want to discard the value of hard work, but you may need to redefine it to mean steady, consistent focus.  Or you may realize you value curiosity and commitment more than hard work.  Take the time to identify these supportive values.

Understand Your Motives

Next consider your supportive motivations.  Why to you want what you want?  Do you want abundance for greater peace of mind? So you can travel?  So you can invest in an idea or a project?  So you can give it away to some worthy cause?  So you can describe yourself as rich?  For the power and status of it?

For the purposes of being true to your intention, all motives have the same power.  There are no “worthy” or “unworthy” motivations.  Only your commitment matters.  It is extremely important, however, that your motivations are true for you.  Do you want to earn a Ph.D. because you should, because it’s expected in your family?  Then the motivation is probably not yours, but theirs.  Or do you want the learning and the degree?

Listen to your heart.  What propels you from within to pursue the path you have chosen?

Create With Your Emotions

Finally, what are your supporting emotions?  You will have identified some or all of these emotions while setting your intention.  As you work with your intention statement, others will emerge.  Read your intention statement aloud, listen to it with your heart, and identify the emotions that arise.  Do you feel happy, peaceful, enthusiastic, jubilant, determined?  Write them down.  These emotions have creative power.

These three aspects of what’s true for you – values, motivations and emotions – will support, sustain, and nourish your manifestation effort.  Whenever you feel doubt or uncertainty, reconnect with these aspects of what your original intention means to you.

Make the Commitment

Now ask yourself this important questions:  What will I have to give up? Currently, you’re devoting your time and energy toward your reality as it is now.  Your intention will change the balance of your life in some way.  Will it require time you currently dedicate to something else?  Will it require you to refocus your energy?  Will it cost money?  Will it challenge your creativity?  With you have to break an old habit?  Will you have to give up a long-held belief?

When I was writing fiction (and not selling what I wrote), I realized I held a deep fear that my success would negatively impact my marriage.  If I had been asking these questions then, I would have answered:  I have to give up that fear.

Expand into Yourself

And a final point to consider:  Who will I be as a result? Currently, you see yourself as a person who does not have what you have stated you want.  If you change your thinking, your beliefs, your habit patterns, your focus, and/or your priorities, you will be someone who does have.  What differences do you imagine might occur?  If you give up fear (guilt, poverty, anger, depression, loneliness, frustration), who will you be?

Can you see yourself as healthy?  Happy?  Strong?  Confident?  In your power?  On purpose?  Whole?  Can you see yourself as the creator of your life?  Can you see yourself in partnership with the universe?  Take a moment and feel the power of having/being/doing.  Feel the truth of it.  Know it’s already within you, and your willingness will bring it into fullness.

Reinforcing Your Intention

Now that your intention is becoming clearer and stronger, I encourage you to work with your statement every day.  Use the emotions you’ve associated with this intention.  Let them expand within you.  Let the energy of them circulate through your body.  Repeat the words of your intention.  Visualize what you want as finished, complete, manifest, fulfilled.  Express your gratitude for it.  See yourself serving with this intention and through it.

The time you dedicate to this practice can be the same fifteen or twenty minutes every day, i.e. 3:30 p.m.  Or you can attach it to something you already do every day:  when you wake up but before you get up, just before you go to sleep, after breakfast, in the shower.  Or you can keep it in your head and heart throughout the day, repeating it often and frequently evoking the emotions by which you will manifest it.

Establish a “sacred” space around your practice, in that you do not profane it with fear, doubt, objections, ill-will toward anyone else, or self-judgment.  Reverence this time as your communion with your soul, with your intention, with those you want to serve, and with the universe.  However, in the beginning, if doubts and objections should arise, keep a piece of paper or a notebook handy and jot them down.  Observing and naming any resistance will acknowledge to your subconscious that you’re paying attention.  Keeping a log will allow you to focus on the intention rather than the potential problems.

As you continue through this process, this sacred space will become more and more important to you, and you will find your practice becoming increasingly powerful.

I provide one-on-one empowerment coaching.   Feel free to contact me personally by emailing me directly:  kathy@kathyjacobson.com

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Posted in Beliefs, Choice, Clarity, Making Miracles, Willingness, intentions, manifestation | 4 Comments »

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