Mind Power | The Miracle Way

Archive for the ‘Mind Power’ Category

Observer Challenges

Sunday, January 1st, 2012

In my recent post titled The Creation Conundrum, I ended with one of the challenges of Observer Mode, the difficulty of staying in neutral. As with a car, when you shift out of gear you take away one of your means for control. When the transmission’s disengaged, the car will easily follow the path of least resistance.

To stay in neutral emotionally, you must maintain equanimity. You can use your breaks – refuse to let momentum pull you into Interpreter Mode. You can use your gas pedal – consciously chose an emotion from Partner Mode. Or you can use the transmission – hold steady with the emotions of Observer Mode. Which one you choose depends on where you are parked, how hard it was to get there, how urgent you are to go somewhere else, and how full your gas tank is.

First Challenge – Stay in Neutral

To be in neutral emotionally is to have reached a relatively flat surface. It doesn’t take much of a shove to start coasting back down the hill again. However, your response to a shove will depend not on the steepness of the hill but the difficulty of the climb. Very likely, in some areas of your life you can stride up a steep slope with ease, while in other areas you struggle to surmount a slight incline. The energy required to go backward is inverse to the energy it took to go forward. If you achieved the plateau of neutrality with little effort, it will probably take a huge effort to push you back down into judgment. If it took a concerted effort to become neutral, a little tap might send you sliding down.

There’s an emotional position in Observer Mode I haven’t mentioned yet. It’s the state of healthy discontent. Often, discontent takes the form of judgment, much like consternation or discomfort or irritation. It can also be the soul’s yearning for best good. You possess a basic instinct to be the best person you can be, to serve the world and mankind to the best of your ability, and to gain mastery, empowerment and enlightenment. In Victim or Interpreter Mode, it’s easy to loose touch with that instinct, but the spark will never die out completely. When you reach Observer Mode, you essentially add energy to the spark, and it flames into life. The resulting sense of healthy discontent will pull you toward Partner Mode.

Whether you can put yourself in gear and step on the gas will depend on your reserves. Staying in neutral a while gives you a chance to refuel, to get to know yourself better, to enjoy the view, to study your road map, to take stock of your options. In Observer Mode you have 100 times the personal power you had in Interpreter Mode, and it may take some time to discover the full range of your new capabilities.

When you are free of judgment, your possibilities include: child-like levels of enjoyment and delight, security as in a mother’s arms, clarity like rain-fresh air, the hope of a new day, and in-the-now acceptance. It may take practice to fully make use of your expanded ability to marvel, to savor, to give thanks, to enjoy, to relax, to be.

Eventually, you will know your emotions are secure, you will know it would take more than a nudge (or a shove, or a blast) to knock you into a state of less power. Refueled, your innate desire for growth, for maximizing yourself, will propel you up the next slope.

Second Challenge – Accept the Possibilities

Another new challenge of Observer Mode is that of dealing with infinite possibilities.

Interpreter Mode makes things difficult, while Observer makes things possible.

When you leave Interpreter Mode for Observer Mode, the sudden vista of what’s possible can be both overwhelming and confusing. If you could see the spectrum of possibilities as a continuum, everything you don’t want would stretch off to the left and everything you do want would stretch off to the right. You could easily pivot to the right and march straight in the direction of what you want.

In actuality, the landscape is not flat or even. It spreads out in every direction, with hills and dales, broad avenues and dead-ends, successes and failures, comfort and discomfort, security and danger.

In Interpreter Mode your options seemed mostly “bad,” and you could count it a win if you made the best of a bad situation. In Observer Mode the possibility certainly exists that you could make a mistake. Except as soon as you fear choosing badly, you slide back into judgment. And this presents another conundrum for the Observer: How do you remain neutral in this landscape in which everything (good and bad) is possible?

The answer can be found within the personal power you access when you become the observer.

As with all modes, the power that becomes available to you exists in the emotions of that mode. Mastering the power you’ve accessed is yet another challenge of Observer Mode.

Third Challenge – Master the Emotion

Each of the emotions of Observer Mode has its own power, its own energy. When you experience one of these emotions, you tap into the energy and embody its power. If you want to experiment with this a bit, try the following: Sit quietly. Get into the now by letting go of all judgments and becoming neutral. Then pick an Observer emotion and think of something that will evoke that emotion within you. Spend a moment or two observing the way your body responds to that emotion. Then pick another and repeat the process. Take note of the shifts of energy in your body.

As I tried the experiment myself, when I evoked compassion I felt my heart swell. When I evoked curiosity, my face and forehead relaxed. And when I evoked amusement, I chuckled.

No two people experience emotional energy in exactly the same way, so pay attention to how it feels to you. And if you can’t sense the energy immediately, no worries. You wouldn’t expect to play the piano the first time you sat at the keyboard.

Here’s something you can do – sort of like a first finger piano exercise: Find a quiet place and seclude yourself for ten or fifteen minutes. Choose any Observer emotion and let it fill your consciousness. The following guide might help:

Think about what that emotion means to you.
Thing about times when you’ve experienced that emotion.
Remember what generated that emotion within you.
Identify any current aspect of your life that might benefit from receiving that emotion.

Take admiration for instance. You could begin by mentally cataloguing things you admire (sunsets, great art, beautiful bodies, skyscrapers, thick hair, a good book, a job well done). Then bring any one of these things to mind and recall your admiration. Next let your body recall the sensations of admiration. And when your thoughts and your body are connected to the emotion of admiration, recall something that’s going on in your life right now (frustration at work, an interest you want to pursue, tight money, the times you spend with your best friend). Now send admiration toward that aspect of your life (something you admire in a co-worker, what you admire most about what interests you, the good things money will buy, the way your friend listens to you). Enjoy the calm produced by the admiration you first evoke, then feel, then send out.

Consider the time spent engaged in this sort of practice as holding sacred space. Let it become sacred by honoring it and giving it high priority. Do not profane it with Interpreter or Victim emotions. When you schedule the time and dedicate yourself to feeling the energy of Observer emotions, being the energy of Observer emotions, you will discover you can:

Neutralize your conflict.
Ease your pain.
Smooth your way.
Send others encouragement.
Open doors.

When you use the power of Observer Mode emotions for these purposes, you will look out over the landscape of possibilities more objectively.

When you review any downside, you will do so with patience and courage. Just because you can observe the possibilities on the left side of the continuum doesn’t mean you’ll head in that direction.

When you explore the possibilities on the right side of the continuum, you will do so with curiosity and excitement. You’ll see them as real options.

Fourth Challenge – Serve Through Neutrality

Have you ever noticed the calming effect of some rooms or buildings? Researchers are studying the impact on mood and productivity of such things as color, ceiling height, the sharpness or roundness of corners and the placement of furnishings. Sometimes the calm space you enter will have structural elements that contribute to that energy. Other times the calm will be generated by the emotional energy of the person or group that uses the space.

When you are firmly in Observer Mode, your personal power includes the ability to calm others. The calming energy of your neutrality will touch everything within your immediate vicinity. It will also reach across time and space when you think of someone or something and focus your emotions in that direction.

In my previous blog, I mentioned my client who said, in reference to moving out of Interpreter Mode, “But that wouldn’t be any fun!” In reply, I said to him, “It’s a different kind of fun.”

Observer Mode presents many challenges, perhaps more than I’ve mentioned today. Conflict is not one of them. In addition to calm, I expect you will find meeting these challenges to be agreeable, confidence building, constructive, liberating, and healing.

(If you would like more information about personal life coaching, or would like a free introductory session, please contact me: kathy@kathyjacobson.com)

Tags: Best Good, emotional mastery, Energy, personal power, service
Posted in Mind Power, Observer Mode, personal power, service | 26 Comments »

About Time

Sunday, January 23rd, 2011

Imagine time as where you live, specifically, where your soul resides.

Multitudes of people reside emotionally in the past. Some live in dim cottages of negative experiences, foraging scraps of hurt, anger, regret, resentment, grief, isolation, etc. Some live in brittle castles of former glory, feasting on pride (or humility), devotion, satisfaction, gloating, etc.

Hoards of people reside emotionally in the future. Some live in bleak hovels of fear, existing on an unpleasant diet of alarm, scarcity, worry, misgiving, dread, doubt, etc. Some live in vague edifices of fantasy, reaching for the empty fruit of desire, expectancy, greed, lust, impatience, etc.

Minorities of people reside emotionally in the present, dining regularly on acceptance, wonder, curiosity, humor, patience, tolerance, compassion, and courage.

Where do you live?

If you can think of time as place, you have the power to relocate.

Wherever in time you’ve been living, take a good look at the emotions you’ve collected, stored or treasured and evaluate their worth. Do they help you create the life you want? Manifest a specific intention? Access more of your personal power? Do your memories strengthen you or disable you? Do your expectations empower you or immobilize you?

Every place in time has both costs and benefits. It’s easy to criticize the past for its tendency to calcify the heart, or disparage the future for its capacity to shrivel the body. It’s also easy to extol the present for the solid foundation it provides. It’s harder to bless the past for lessons learned and memories accumulated, or embrace the future for the possibilities it holds. It’s harder still to recognize the potential of the present to stagnate the mind.

The Past

While every event of your life holds a potential memory, you probably remember most clearly the events that carried an emotional impact. The degree to which you live in a past event depends on its emotional hold.

Some events remain in your memory with a soft and gentle presence: good memories, fun times, pleasant connections with the people involved. Memories of this sort encourage you to move on. Many even empower you.

Some events inspire you to learn and grow, to see yourself and the world more clearly, to stretch out into new directions. Their influence may be that of helping you discern what works and what doesn’t.

Some events maintain such a strong emotional hold they anchor you to the past. For their own survival, they require you to stay put, to feed and nurture them, to give them life. If you were to move on, they would die. When you agree to their terms, you take up residence in that emotional space. You feel trapped in that time, by that energy.

The Future

Since we’re looking at time as space, consider how often and under what conditions you visit the future.

Are you so detached and indifferent to the future you rarely drop in for a visit? Perhaps you trust the future to take care of itself, with little or no effort on your part. Or perhaps you can’t be bothered, and you’d rather pick up the pieces resulting from your indifference than plan ahead.

The future might feel like the home of a good friend: fun, supportive, generous. You like to hang out there because you learn, you get ideas, you see opportunities, and you return to the present enthused and empowered.

Or perhaps you’ve spent so much time in the future and invested so much energy in it, you live there. The energy might be so anxious and fearful you feel you have to stay there to keep watch, to stay on guard, to prepare for the looming danger. Or it might be so full of anticipation and expectation, you become ensnared by daydreams. The beauty generated by your desire or your greed casts the present in such shadow you can’t abide even looking in the direction of now.

The Present

When you reside in the present, you can look back into the past, learning the lessons and enjoying the memories. When you look forward to the future, you can plan, explore and create. Since, you actually exist in the present, the tools and techniques of the present are easily at hand. When compared to the worst of The Past or The Future, The Present may seem the ideal.

As with the other two wheres of time, however, the present has its challenges, mostly in relationship to the other two time frames. For the present to have power, you must aggressively learn from the past, and you must confidently create the future. Otherwise, the past becomes a fog (as with Alzheimer’s patients), and the future holds no opportunity. It’s entirely possible to be so lost in the now, you sacrifice your personal power to it.

The Power of Time

No doubt you’ve heard the adage, “Time is money.” This statement places a monetary value on time, sometimes down to the second. How much time is worth becomes a question of how much money can be produced in a given amount of time. Actually, time itself is not money, it merely provides money with urgency.

The same goes for power. Time by itself is not power, but it provides a way to think about power. Unlike money, there is no tangible way to measure power, especially personal power. With the Modes of Power diamond, I conceived one way to define power in terms of emotions. I assigned Victim mode a power level of 1, Interpreter mode a power level of 100, Observer mode a power level of 10,000, Partner mode a power level of 1,000,000, and Creator mode a power level of 100,000,000. This is an arbitrary scale. The numbers are for illustration purposes only, and even the emotions I’ve assigned to the different modes will a) have different amounts of power within the mode, and b) sometimes move from mode to mode, depending on your definition or experience with them.

Very clearly, however, the Modes of Power diamond shows the power transitions from misery to struggle, to calm, to cooperation, to oneness.

So what does time have to do with this? In terms of how we measure time, not much. In terms of how we experience time, everything.

A period of time in which we experience no emotion has no power whatsoever. If you can reach a place totally free of emotion, say in meditation, you can stop time. By contrast, when your emotions are generating high levels of energy, time speeds up. The rate at which time elapses is relative to the energy levels of your emotions.

The same is true for how much you reside in a where of time. The stronger your emotional connection to some event, the stronger your ties to that event will be. If the emotion is very strong and exerts a strong pull on you, you will return so frequently to the when of the event it might become your where. On the hand, when an event generates only fleeting emotions, the event itself flows easily through your life .

If you have strong emotional ties to a past event, you must heal the emotions in order to relocate your soul to a different where of time. Strong emotional ties to something you anticipate in the future can likewise fix you in time. Your emotions can bind you to your expectations and close off all other possibilities.

Time as a Function of Power

Time provides you with two extremely important aspects of personal power, the power to heal and the power to create. See Pacify Your Objections for exercises to heal the past and create the future.

In Your Path to Power, I suggested three ways people access their personal power – through the mind, through the body, or through the heart.

Each way of accessing power connects with time in a different way. People who access power through the heart have a direct connection to the past. They have strong healing energy, and in order to create in the present, they need to heal any injuries incurred in the past. Once healing is achieved, creation comes easily.

People who access power through the body have a direct connection to the future. They have strong creative energy, and when that energy is projected into the future, miracles result. In order to create in the present, they need to visualize the future in the widest possible view of possibilities. Once creation has begun, healing follows easily.

People who access their power through the mind have a direct connection to the present, because all choices originate in the mind, and choices can only be made in the present. They need to choose in the present before they can either heal the past and or create the future.

Where to Begin

Clearly, everyone is better off if they live in the present, since choice is only possible in the now. However, coming to now is the starting point only if you access your power through the mind. If you are a mind-power person, you may find settling into the now is merely a matter of choice. You decide to move from Interpreter mode and relocate in Observer or Partner mode, and there you are.

Coming to now if you are a heart-power person may require some dedicated effort to heal the past (often called recapitulation). You can revisit past experiences and revise them by rewriting and reenacting. Or you can identify the emotions you’ve been carrying around since the event occurred, release those emotions and fill the vacuum with different energy. Either way, healing occurs when you let go of the Victim or Interpreter emotions and replace them with Observer or Partner emotions. From Observer perspective, your possibilities expand and you can begin to create.

Reclaiming now if you are a body-power person requires recalling every vestige of Interpreter energy you’ve projected into the future. Be very clear that what you’ve sent into the future will deliver back to you in kind. If you project any form of fear (dread, anxiety, apprehension, worry) into the future, the future will deliver back some manifestation of what you fear. If you project any form of avarice (greed, hunger, ambition, pride, lust) into the future, the future may return some form of what you desire, but it won’t fill the emptiness that motivated the desire in the first place. When you step out of Interpreter mode into Observer or Partner mode, you free yourself of the energy needs of fear or conquest. You become calm, and calm illuminates a vast array of possibilities. Healing becomes one of the possibilities you see; a possibility that can easily become reality.

Live in the present. Use the past to heal and the future to create. All three aspects of time are key to accessing your power and manifesting your best good.

If you would like personal help mastering these aspects of time, please contact me directly through email: kathy@kathyjacobson.com

Tags: Choice, Creating, Healing, personal power
Posted in Body Power, Choice, Healing, Heart Power, Mind Power, Uncategorized | Comments Off

Your Path to Power

Monday, January 10th, 2011

Some years ago, I read an essay by a Tibetan lama who presented a list of benefits of meditation. I found myself in agreement with him up until he claimed meditation was the only way to achieve those benefits. Since I enjoyed most of the benefits cited, yet had never practiced meditation as he described it, I examined my approach. What route had I taken?

My answer: through reason. For years I had been thinking things through, logically differentiating what worked from what didn’t, and consciously choosing what worked. I concluded that both reason and meditation have the potential to accomplish the same result. In my coaching, I would encourage some clients to meditate, and I would encourage some clients to ponder. Then I had a client, a musician, who rebelled against both. He’d say, “I just have to practice!”

His claim gave me more to think about, and I soon added practice as the third path to wisdom and personal power. I began to see these ways as via the heart (meditation), as via the mind (reason), and as via the body (practice). As I explored the implications and possibilities of this idea, the concept kept expanding and touching more and more areas of the manifestation process.

In today’s blog, I’ll suggest some ways you can determine your way. Please recognize this is a work in progress, and it’s still in a relatively raw state. (I happily welcome comments, questions, observations, and hearing of the results you get when you apply any of these ideas. The more we test the ideas the more we’ll learn.)

Congruence

Even as you’re recognizing your way of accessing your personal power, keep in mind the importance of uniting mind, heart and body. If you think your way is through the mind, this means only that you connect/approach/ignite/access your power by way of the mind. Once you tap into your power via the mind, your mind and heart easily absorb that power and participate in it.

Likewise for accessing power by mind or heart. The access comes via your particular means then encompasses the whole.

Your power is a giant, infinite expanse, with no limits and no barriers. As a human being, you have recognizable aspects of body (your reference point for action and physical experiences), mind (your reference point for thoughts and mental experiences) and heart (your reference point for emotions and psychological experiences). When these three aspects of you are united, aligned and congruent, you feel “whole.”

One of these aspects of your wholeness provides the best gateway to your power. If your access is the mind, when you master your thoughts, reason, logic, etc., you throw wide the gate. If your access is the heart, mastering your feelings, emotions, focus, etc. opens the gate. If your access is the body, you throw wide the gate by mastering your physicality, senses, imagination, etc.

Once you accept your power, it flows smoothly and quickly throughout, and you experience a sense of wholeness. When you gain an understanding of your way – the portal through which you most effectively access your power – you acquire a key to your wholeness. Wholeness expands into enlightenment, which governs and multiplies your power.

Observe Yourself

So how do you know which is your way? The best answer I have is by intuition. You know yourself better than anyone else. You are the only one who can truly hear the promptings and messages of your feelings, your thoughts, your behaviors, and the events of your life.

However, here are four observations you can make as you sort through the evidence. In each example, choose a), b) or c).

1. Image you are in a speed dating session. A group of twenty people forms two concentric circles, men and women facing each other. At seven minute intervals, the circles will progress in opposite directions, so you face someone new of the opposite sex. In seven minutes of conversation, you will decide “yes” or “no,” then move on.

Of course, the first “yes” or “no” is likely to be physical – age, looks, grooming, style, etc. – and probably takes place before the first word is spoken. Then the hard part begins. The questions you exchange might be about family, achievements, life experiences, preferences, but at the core of each question will be the quest for:

a)         Common knowledge and shared interests.

b)        Common sympathies and shared attitudes toward the world.

c)         Common activities and shared appreciations.

2. Imagine you are at the top of a hill, enjoying nature. You observe the beauty, feel the power, and recognize the components. Are you:

a) More curious about the world itself, the flora and fauna, the names of things and their structure, the indications of weather and climate.

b) More speechless with awe and wonder, more conscious of the infinite.

c) More fascinated by your sensory perceptions, the sounds, smells, colors and shadows, more aware of distances and perspectives.

3. Imagine yourself deep into the manifestation process. You’ve identified an intention; you’ve clarified it so you know exactly what you mean and why; you’ve purified it of fears, doubts and expectations; you’ve pacified your objections; and you’ve expanded your possibilities. Now you’re ready to intensify your focus. Which of the following resonates more strongly?

a)         Giving your intention more attention through affirmations and visualizations.

b)        Becoming tranquil and letting the peace of your intention fill your body?

c)         Becoming more cooperative with your intention through gratitude and willingness.

4. Imagine three different strengths:

a)         The ability to choose

b)        The ability to focus

c)         The ability to implement.

In life, these strengths may seem like steps to achievement: first, choose what you want to do, then give it your attention, then take action. However, these “steps” are actually different approaches, and one will feel more natural to you than the other two. In manifestation, when you start with the one that fits you best, the other two will follow easily.

Recognizing

Each of the above examples indicates a different approach to life and to personal power. Consider these as possible indicators when you contemplate your own way.

a) through the mind: Philosophy and knowledge are top priorities; you are curious about the world, how it all fits together, and the way one thing influences another; you are most likely to intensify an intention through increased mental attention; you choose easily.

b) Through the heart: The well-being of others and your world are top priorities; you are curious about the infinite; you are most likely to intensify an intention through tranquility and letting peace fill your body; you focus easily.

c) through the body: Beauty and perception are top priorities; you are curious about things you can’t perceive through your senses; you are most likely to intensify an intention by becoming more cooperative with your tools, your talents, your body and your energy; you implement easily.

I have observed that people choose different walks of life depending on their innate way of accessing their personal power. Healers, communicators and managers tend to access their power by way of the heart. Artists, athletes and artisans tend to access their power by way of the body. And scientists, philosophers and teachers tend to access their power by way of the mind.

Tags: Attention, Choice, Meditation, personal power, Practice, Reason, Tranquility
Posted in Attention, Body Power, Choice, Heart Power, Mind Power | Comments Off

Be Your Magnetic Self

Sunday, November 14th, 2010

Almost anywhere you turn, you can run into a concept called “The Law of Attraction.” It’s the latest iteration of ancient wisdom. Two and a half millennia ago, the Buddha said, “As we think, so we become.”

Yes, what we think is critical to our results. This does not mean it’s possible to think something into existence. Napoleon Hill, the author of Think and Grow Rich and a major modern source on the subject said, “First comes thought; then organization of that thought, into ideas and plans; then transformation of those plans into reality.” Somehow thoughts need to be transformed into reality, and transformation always takes energy.

Energy requires a power source. In the physical sense, that’s the sun; one way or another all available energy comes from the sun. In the metaphysical sense, where does personal power some from? Actually, I don’t know; maybe we also get it from the sun. What I do know is that every human being has an unlimited amount of personal power stored inside, sort of like the sun. Most of us tap into a very miniscule amount of inner power, so maybe a more apt analogy would be a volcano. Consider the vast energy of a latent volcano, and imagine a tiny wisp of steam escaping through a geyser pool. We possess that vast energy, but we use only that wisp of steam.

As you live your life, this infinite power source matters in two ways – the amount you access at any given time, and the pressure that builds inside when you keep that energy closed off.

Your power to “attract” comes from within. Attraction is magnetism. (Okay, so you’re a volcano and a magnet.) Magnetism pulls. You energize your connection with what you’ve chosen, and that creates the pull. When you entice what you’ve chosen to come to you, it’s more likely to come. Nothing pushes.

Except no two people engage their magnetic energy in exactly the same way. In this article I’m presenting four approaches. One may immediately resonate with you, or you may want to experiment until you discover the way that will work most powerfully for you.

Think

An amazing number of sources advise getting out of your head. Or to avoid the “paralysis of analysis.” Or to stop over-thinking. Some experts even claim the mind’s the enemy.

What they really mean is, “Don’t think yourself into a pit.” When you get caught up in some story, that story is probably wrong, and faulty premises always produce faulty conclusions. But that’s not the fault of the mind. The mind is an excellent, highly-evolved, most wonderful aspect of the human state. Use your mind well, and it will assist you in marvelous ways. Be confident of your mind and yourself, and confidence will turn on your magnetic field.

Confidence is freedom from doubt. To increase your confidence, try the following:

Honor your past accomplishments.

Do you find yourself downplaying your role in something that went well? Perhaps you’ve been taught not to toot your own horn, or not to get a swelled head, or not to get too big for your britches. Break free of those restrictions and recognize your strengths, your abilities, your contributions. Make this self-assessment of your accomplishments as a neutral observer. Send both the harsh judge and the meek supplicant out of the room. For this exercise, you need neither humility nor ego; you do need detachment and curiosity.

Acknowledge your talents and abilities.

Every human being is gifted. Your gifts may have shown up early in your life, you may have grown up honoring and cultivating them. Maybe you didn’t start to discover what you’re good at until you had a chance to explore and experiment. Perhaps your faults and flaws and weaknesses were more readily reinforced than your strengths. Turn off every one else’s voice besides your own and recognize your strengths. Honor who you are. Also honor who you are not.

Recognize the ways in which your choices are true for you.

If you try to force fit yourself into something that is not true for you, you will experience struggle and disappointment. If you resist something that is true for you, you will experience struggle and unhappiness. Untrue choices never respond well to the Law of Attraction. True choices come with ease and joy.

Invest your awareness in whatever you’ve chosen.

Be mindful. Stay attentive. Visualize. Affirm. Reinforce. Love. Enjoy. Imagine the result of what you want.

Act

Action is probably the point of most disagreement when it comes to the Law of Attraction. On the most ethereal end of the scale, where the emphasis is on thinking something into existence, action is often scorned. On the most practical end of the scale, action is The Way – if you don’t do, you don’t get.

For some people, action is the most important component, and therefore the essence of their personal power. However, power responds better to some implementations than others. Action likes to be invited, not forced. In fact, enjoyment is the most important ingredient in all actions intended to attract. Invite what you’ve chosen to attract to come out and play.

To increase enjoyment, try the following:

Delight in your self, in your choices, in your partners, and in The Infinite.

To increase your delight in yourself, imagine yourself as a loving parent entranced by a toddler. Imagine you are the toddler and a loving parent applauds and encourages everything you do. Even if you’re stumbling around and making mistakes, let yourself experience surprise and delight at you just being you.

To increase your delight in your choices, imagine each choice as a Christmas present, unwrap it and rediscover every wonderful thing that makes it attractive to you.

To increase your delight in your partners (including those of non-human nature), identify them, reach out to them with acceptance and appreciation, and celebrate their contributions to your efforts.

To increase your delight in The Infinite, think of the best friend you ever had, the one you’ve always had the most fun with. Then imagine The Infinite in that role, with a sense of humor and a sense of adventure, a friend who hates to be left behind.

Realize your talents and abilities are both opportunity and responsibility.

Here you sit, a bundle of creative talent and energetic ability. It’s as if you are both artist and studio. You are all the paints and canvases and palettes and brushes. You are also the artist who can turn you into a masterpiece. You can. And you have everything you need. And if you don’t, who will?

Reinforce your choices by your actions.

Look at what you want to attract. Choose it. Then assess what you need to learn, what skills you need to acquire, what effort might be required to reach the level you aspire to. Then go to work. You can’t be a best-selling novelist without putting words on a page. You can’t run a marathon without putting in the miles.

Engage all your partners in the how.

I often advise my clients to concentrate on what and surrender how to The Infinite. Expand that idea. Reach out to every person or thing or energy involved in your endeavor and invite their help. Let your friends, your tools, your resources, and your beliefs be a part of the action.

Feel

Emotion is energy. Every emotion you experience emits an energy that goes somewhere. When you’ve chosen something you want to attract, your feelings matter. They help or they hinder. They rarely do nothing.

This is true for everyone, but for some people emotional energy impacts their ability to attract more than either thoughts or actions. For these people, Emotions can be obstacles that block attraction in ways Thoughts and Actions can’t break through. If your attractive power comes from your heart, your best approach is to remove those emotional barriers and open the flow. The key is tranquility, which is essentially freedom from stress.

To increase tranquility, try the following:

Release all attachments and expectations.

To release attachments, let words like should, must, necessary, and can’t become signal lights. When they enter your thoughts, recognize them as indicators of an emotional attachment to something that causes stress – such as a belief. No, it’s not all up to you. No, you don’t have to work twice as hard. No, what you’ve chosen doesn’t have to be difficult. Yes, you have within you all the abilities and strengths needed for this choice.

To release expectations, expand your vision of the possible. Make a list of all the possibilities you can think of – good and bad. Recognize it’s all possible, then cross off the ones you don’t want. This lets all those you consider acceptable to move from possible to probable. You make way for your Best Good.

Believe your talents and abilities are aligned with your best good. Believe a miracle is possible

Take the previous suggestion one step further. Imagine the most miraculous way your choice could manifest. Let your emotional response to that probability expand until your entire body tingles with it. Relax into that energy without letting it congeal into an absolute, and then carry that tranquility around with you.

Give and take in equal portions.

Most people who access their power through the heart find it easy to give. They tend to be caregivers, teachers, ministers, healers, and giving is what they do. Many of them find it difficult to be on the receiving end. Welcome the efforts of your partners, your patients, your congregation, your students, and The Infinite to help you on your way.

Energize your choices with your emotions.

Removing resistance and stress must come first. Once you’ve achieved tranquility, add those creative emotions that will energize your magnetism: respect, compassion, gratitude, peace and authenticity.

Leap

Do you often get ideas that seem to come out of nowhere? Maybe a creative solution to a problem, or a sudden urge to walk down an unknown street and turn into the first restaurant you come to, or a decision to go back to school. Perhaps you can find the seeds of thought or latent emotions that inspired it, but you couldn’t track back through the progression that took you from Point A to Point B.

Sometimes you look at such intuitive leaps and think, “Yeah! Of course! Exactly what I was looking for.” Sometimes you think, “Really? That’s got to be the craziest thing ever.” Intuition can be both disconcerting and energizing. If you’re operating from some level of struggle or judgment, it’s generally wiser not to leap. If you’re operating from some level of calm or creativity, the energy can pull you in the direction of something you’ve chosen to attract. To improve the magnetism of your intuition, let yourself reside in a state of willingness.

To increase willingness try the following:

Believe what you choose is possible.

You know the old saying, “Whether you believe you can or you believe you can’t, you’re right.” Well, it’s true. From a place of calm neutrality, probe for what you believe about yourself and what you’ve chosen to attract. If your current belief doesn’t allow for it to be possible – even probable – decide what you want to believe instead, and adopt the new belief.

Synchronize your choices with your talents and abilities.

You have the talent and the ability to do (or have, or be) whatever you choose. If those talents and abilities are not fully developed, or if you are not employing them fully, bring them up to speed. Become the person who does (or has, or is) whatever it is you’ve chosen.

Simplify your thoughts, action and emotions.

Perhaps when you’ve made some intuitive leap, you’re one of those people who has to make it make sense. Relax. Let go of all those loose ends you’re grasping at. Let whatever you’re wrestling with assume its simplest, easiest form. Let it tell you what to do with it.

Facilitate what you’ve chosen to attract by getting out of your own way.

Any leap can become encumbered. Add a touch of fear, a dab of protection, a bit of defensiveness, a sprinkle of meekness, and before you know it you’re facing a major obstacle of your own making. How can you possibly expect whatever your trying to attract to get through? Dismantle such roadblocks. Clear the way. If you believe your choice is possible, you can also believe it’s easy.

If what you’ve been trying to attract remains elusive, I invite you to contact me for empowerment coaching. Email me at kathy@kathyjacobson.com.

Tags: acting, Attraction, Confidence, Enjoyment, feeling, Intuition, Leaping, Magnetism, personal power, thinking, Tranquility
Posted in Acceptance, Attention, Attraction, Body Power, Calmness, Choice, Cooperation, Curiosity, Gut Power, Heart Power, Mind Power, Miracles, Neutrality, Possibilities, Surrender, The Law of Attraction, Trust, Willingness, personal power | 43 Comments »

Four Approaches to Problem Solving

Sunday, November 7th, 2010

Life is very complex. There are the things we like and the things we don’t like. The things that come easily and the things that provide struggle. There are the challenges we face individually and the challenges we face with others.

Questions further complicate the mix: Ethical questions. Philosophical questions. How-things-work questions. How-things-are-connected questions. Questions of cause and effect. Questions of what, when, where, who and why.

Then, even if we’ve found some satisfying answers, we face problems: Money problems. Health problems. Relationship problems. Employment problems. Getting-things-done problems.

Problems are often not singular in nature. We don’t stand alone. Finding solutions requires us to deal with the opinions, beliefs, values, expectations and experiences of others. Many of the challenges we face as individuals require us to work with others to solve, resolve, mend, restore and create. To solve problems effectively it helps to understand how we approach them – and how our approach may differ from that of someone else.

Today I’m going to explore the challenge of problem solving by looking at four different styles. For want of a better way to distinguish them, I’ll call them Empathic, Active, Thoughtful, and Facilitative. I’ll explore each style’s approach, effort and resolution.

To illustrate, I’m going to use a problem of my own, and I’ll approach it from the viewpoint of each of the four different styles.

I tend to be messy and I don’t put much energy into housekeeping. As a result, I’m always behind in my filing, I have piles of papers all over my work areas, shoes end up wherever I take them off, and I might leave a basket of folded laundry sitting in the middle of my living room for days. As a result, I rarely invite friends to just drop by. I’d like to change the habits of a lifetime and make my home clean and inviting.

The Desired Resolution

I’m starting with the preferred resolution of each style because it’s often easier to see the way when you know the destination.

People with an Empathic style of problem solving see Healing as the desired outcome. They like for all wounds contributing to, or resulting from, the problem to be addressed and mended.

If I saw healing as the solution to my messiness, I’d withdraw all judgment of myself and my past behaviors so the wounds of the past no longer influence the present. I’d expect this to clear the field so new habits could grow

People with an Active style see Going Forward as the desired outcome. To them, resolution enables forward momentum, and they like progress to begin as soon as possible.

If I looked forward for a solution, I’d consider the problem solved when I installed new structures in place of old ones, and new behaviors became my norm.

People with a Logical style see Knowledge as the desired outcome. They want to learn from the experience, and they want the knowledge gained to bring about permanent solutions.

If I looked for knowledge as the solution, I’d expect my efforts to produce a better understanding of myself as well as a cleaner house.

People with a Facilitative style see Congruence as the desired outcome. They want to bring all the factors – behaviors, beliefs, values, etc. – together into a unified whole.

If my solution were congruence, my thoughts, actions and emotions would all be aligned with neatness instead of with messiness.

Clarifying the Problem

Now that we have a clearer sense of what we might be looking for in the solution, let’s go back to the beginning and discover the starting place. When you’re assessing a problem, what are the elements you look for first?

Empathic problem solvers tend to start with The Roots of the problem. Their first question might be, “Why?” They look for any wounds, mistakes, omissions, fallacies, assumptions, or unresolved problems that may have contributed.

If I were to start here in assessing my messiness, I would ask, “Why am I messy? Is this something I learned? Did I come at it as a rebellion? Do I have a careless personality?” I’d be looking for something within me that needs to be healed.

Action-oriented problem solvers tend to start with The Energy of the problem. Their first question might be, “How?” They look at a problem as if it were a fire and want to know what continues to fuel it. What’s the oxygen source? They see removing the energy as both the strategy and the end game.

If I were to start here, I would ask, “How can I take energy away from my messiness and generate energy toward neatness?” I would look at my habit patterns and consider what new structures or systems I could put into place to help me get better results.

Logical problem solvers tend to start with The Players. (Players aren’t limited to people. Consider such players as money, the weather, your body, Management, etc.) Their first question might be, “Who?” They want to know who’s involved, and they consider each Player’s degree of involvement, their willingness to participate in a solution, their ability to negotiate, and what they can add to the solution.

If I were to start here, I would ask, “Are there any other players besides me? What role do they play?” I would assess my tools, my time, my resources, and other aspects of my circumstances. (I live alone, and I have the necessary tools and sufficient time. So, nope. For this problem, no Players but me.)

Facilitative problem solvers tend to start with The Factors. Their first question might be “What?” They like to tease apart the problem and discover all influencing factors, including economics, beliefs, time constraints, legal constraints, politics, external influences, etc.

If I were to start here, I would ask, “What are the factors that contribute to a) my messiness or b) the solution. What pattern do they form?

Effecting a Solution

Once you’ve identified the beginning and the end, consider the processes you use most comfortably in between.

Since Empathic problem solvers are looking for healing, they see Love as a particularly strong healing agent. They prefer to extend compassion and acceptance to all parties and all parts of the problem so that healing occurs all along the way.

If I expected to heal my messiness, I would remove all judgment of myself, my past choices, my life-long habits and my current behaviors. I would accept that given those choices and habits, I’ve always done the best I could. And then I would look at my home with love and imagine it as clean and beautiful and welcoming.

Since Active problem solvers look ahead and focus on creating new patterns by changing the energy, they proceed with Daring. They see practice as essential to improvement, and reinforcement as essential to change. If anyone or anything is perpetuating the problem or making it worse, they’ll take on those challenges first.

If I expected to implement my way to a cleaner house, I would keep trying different ways to invest my energy until I found one that produced different results – and that I could maintain.

Since Logical problem solvers are looking for growth, they like to employ Attention to effect a solution. Once they’ve identified The Players and the roles of those players, they encourage the various Players to make better choices (or they create better relationships with the non-human Players), until the whole thing works better, and everyone’s smarter in the process.

If I took the logical approach, I would look at my current choices and evaluate the consequences of those choices. I would address those choices logically, in terms of cost versus benefit and loss versus gain.

Since Facilitative problem solvers are looking for congruence, they like to Release Resistance. They recognize obstacles, roadblocks and all forms of struggle as resistance, and they know resistance hinders both change and progress. They already know the various components of the problem, so they explore those components for resistance. They then work to remove impediments and smooth the way.

If I took the facilitative approach to my messiness, I’d review my behaviors to see if there are any ways I’m making the situation more difficult than it needs to be, I’d review my beliefs to discover any that hamper me, and I’d adopt neatness as a value.

Discovering Your Way

Perhaps as you’ve been reading this article, one of these styles has resonated with you more than another. Perhaps one style seems more applicable than another to some types of problems. Maybe one style seems generally more useful to you than another, and you’d like to work with it until you make it your own.

Chances are, if you tend to lead with your head, asking questions, exploring ideas and seeing the order of things, your style is more likely to be Logical.

If you tend to relate to others through your feelings and care about the long-term emotional impact of your choices, your style is more likely to be Empathic.

If you tend to gather information through your senses, watching, listening, tasting, smelling, and touching, and if you would rather do than think about doing, your style is more likely to be Active.

If you tend to be intuitive, aware of such things as time, space, connection, and position without giving them your attention, and if you’re willing to leap before you look, your style is more likely to be Congruent.

As a life coach, I help my clients clarify their challenges and devise the kinds of solutions that will work best for them. If you would like help in this area, please contact me. email – kathy@kathyjacobson.com

Tags: Healing
Posted in Acceptance, Attention, Body Power, Congruence, Cooperation, Daring, Gut Power, Healing, Heart Power, Mind Power, Personal Growth, Problem Solving | 17 Comments »

The Give and Take of Energy

Sunday, October 31st, 2010

A few days ago, a friend of mine sprained her ankle. Since we both like to explore metaphysical connections, we ended up discussing pain – specifically in terms of her ankle, and generally in terms of personal power.

She sprained her ankle, and her body experienced pain. This is the body’s natural, biological response, and it’s important in a survival sense. Through pain, the body says, “I’m injured. Attend to the injury. Don’t ignore it or make it worse.” My friend rubbed a medicinal salve into the injured joint, wrapped it, applied ice and elevated it.

After we spent half an hour speculating about what’s going on in her life that might have attracted the injury in the first place and what lesson there might be for her in the experience, we focused on the energy of pain and its relationship to personal power. Both of us found my model – the Diamond of Mastery – very useful as a vocabulary for deeper understanding.

Every situation – especially painful ones – provide an opportunity to lose personal power or access it, to extract energy or supply it. My friend was laying there with her injured foot propped up. In very simple terms, she had three choices: be miserable, be neutral, be healed. We explored the ramifications of each option from a power perspective.

Depleting Power

The most powerless state of being is, of course, Victim Mode. Those who function at this level believe they have no power and believe there’s no help to found. Their thoughts, actions and/or emotions reinforce this position.

Being a victim always infers helplessness. As soon as someone believes they are helpless, that belief becomes their truth, and they become helpless. They let go of personal power as if it were water and they have no way of holding onto it. Emotions that reflect helplessness include despair, anxiety, distress, and woe. Those emotions reinforce thoughts of helplessness such as: I can’t. There’s no way out. This is too hard (or painful, or terrifying) for me to bear. Such thoughts drive them to actions of withdrawal or suffering, such as complaint, blame, anxiety, addiction, isolation, etc.

Being a victim also often presumes innocence – especially from the victim’s point of view. However, as soon as someone believes themselves free of accountability or complicity they become co-conspirators with their plight. Thoughts such as I didn’t, I’m in the right, or That’s wrong generate emotions that reinforce strife – contempt, outrage, resentment, blame, guilt, fanaticism, etc. Resulting actions include retaliation, destruction, oppression, and vengeance.

Misery can take any of these forms. Misery is like opening a vein and letting your personal power simply drain out of you.

Searching for Power

Until this conversation with my friend, I had never seen Interpreter Mode as a state of searching. I’ve included such emotions as ambition, desire, yearning, possessiveness and envy in that category, but I hadn’t thought about them in terms of searching for one’s own personal power. As we were talking about the energy of pain, I could see how moaning, impatience, and unhappiness were not only forms of resistance, but the longing for personal power. In a way, these emotions say to the injury (or the source of the injury), “You’ve taken away my power and I want you to give it back to me.”

This can apply to any painful situation – lack of money, trouble in a relationship, frustration on the job, an illness. And although something that’s not whole may have the power to fix itself, it doesn’t have the power to fix you. Behaviors that reject or resist the situation may actually be efforts on your part to find strength or personal power. But pulling energy away from something that’s broken will never strengthen you. Whining, swearing, protesting, lamenting, fuming, moaning or disagreeing may be your cries for help, but they drain away healing energy. They weaken the injury itself. You and the situation both lose.

Hoarding Power

Since my friend’s not the type to fret or moan, the discussion to this point was mostly academic. With the injury so fresh, she was perfectly content to indulge in an afternoon of no expectations. But she has a job and a home and responsibilities, and it’s easy to think in terms of what’s wrong, of what’s in the way. We pursued the question of limitations.

How much does any external circumstance limit personal power? We were able to create a long list of resources we had seen as limited and/or limiting at one time or another. We agreed time, money, education, health, and energy were the most common, and we realized that when someone feels limited, the most likely reaction is to conserve. People want to not waste time, save money, preserve their health, budget their energy. The same applies to personal power – when we feel our power is limited, we try to conserve, to save, to preserve. To hoard.

But what if there were no limitations? What if by not hoarding personal power, we not only expanded it but everything else as well? The more my friend and I played with this idea, the more we realized it actually works the other way around. Controlling time, saving money, preserving health and budgeting physical energy drain away huge amounts of personal power. If we could see time and money and health and physical energy as free and flowing and abundant, we’d also have a more abundant supply of personal power.

Observing Power

In the trade-offs between gaining and losing, there’s a mid point of neutrality that’s actually quite powerful. This is when you remove all resistance and simply be with what is. I’ve had quite a lot of experience with holding neutrality in times of stress and physical adversity, so my friend agreed to let me coach her a bit around the pain in her ankle. First we did some calming exercises (Calm and Curious), then I encouraged her to relax any resistance, to ease away from the hurt, to think about the area around the injury that didn’t hurt and let the area of injury simply become empty space.

If resistance drains positive power away from an injury, then non-resistance lets the components of the injury get on with a natural healing process. When you can simply observe what is rather than label it, deny it, argue with it, or try to control it in some other way, you stop being an energy drag. Without drag or depletion, every injury heals more quickly.

Directing Power

“So now what?” my friend asked. “I have to admit my ankle hurts less, but I don’t feel like dancing.”

I imagined a conduit between her and her injured ankle, flowing with energy. If frustration and complaint draw energy away from the injury, and neutrality stops the flow of energy so the ankle can preserve whatever wasn’t lost when the injury occurred, what would make energy flow back into the ankle and accelerate healing?

Well, probably Partner Power. So we looked at the list again, and my friend identified three emotions she thought would be most helpful to her: cheerfulness, appreciation and trust. She could be cheerful even if she hurt, she certainly appreciated her ankle and how well it had supported her all her life, and she trusted all would soon be well. I suggested she call up those emotions and direct them toward her ankle. She agreed that sounded like a lot more fun than worrying about how long it would take to heal. Every time she thought about her ankle in some limiting way, she would turn off that draining energy and send cheerful, restorative energy toward it.

Reinforcing Power

I suspect that everyone is born with the potential for unlimited access to infinite power. I also suspect that almost from the moment we’re born we start perceiving limitations. Few of us are taught to use our thoughts, our actions, our emotions, and our instincts in ways that energize us and expand our potential.

Where you perceive you can, then you can. And where you perceive you can’t, then you can’t. Explore the areas of can to discover the components of your facility. What you find then becomes your guidebook for how to turn any can’t into a can. And then, the more willing you are to transfer your proven strengths, the more you apply correct principles, the more you practice, the more you will notice change and growth. Reinforce what works, and what works will work better for you.

Think in terms of giving energy rather than taking it. The more you give, the more you gain. The more you take, the more you lose. This choice exists in every situation – and it’s always yours to make.

For personal help in identifying your strengths and Personal Power, and then translating those strengths into results, please contact me directly. Email: kathy@kathyjacobson.com

Tags: Choice, Creative Power, emotional mastery, Energy, Healing, Overcoming Obstacles, personal power, Power thinking, Processing Information
Posted in Acceptance, Beliefs, Calmness, Cooperation, Healing, Interpreter Mode, Mind Power, Observer Mode, Partner Mode, Trust, Willingness, personal power | 40 Comments »

Look Differently, See Differently

Sunday, October 24th, 2010

It’s been said in Utah that everyone’s a Mormon – a Mormon, a non-Mormon, or an ex-Mormon. Recently I heard a terrific reply – “Yeah, and everyone’s a chicken, a Chicken, or a non-Chicken, or an ex-Chicken.”

Clearly, it’s a matter of perspective. If you happen to be a chicken, you probably see everything from the perspective of chicken or not-chicken. (Do you suppose they have any concept of ex-chicken?) As a person, you have probably never considered yourself to be a non-chicken.

No, you’re not a chicken, you’re a human being. And human beings have a strong tendency to think in dichotomous terms – even when we can see the shades of gray. Everywhere you turn there’s some way of looking at yourself that’s either/or: Conservative/Liberal, Artistic/Scientific, City/Rural, Rich/Poor, Introvert/Extrovert, Nerd/Jock. More sophisticated systems, such as Meyers-Briggs or the Ennead, bring other facets into the mix, expanding the number of possible factors. Up to a point, such systems can expand our awareness; they can also become just another set of labels. And labels, by nature, are always constraining.

Today, I want to explore some different ways of looking at yourself and your choices.

Character Traits

As a self-aware person you probably try to be mindful of both what you’ve got going for you and your challenges. From a dichotomous perspective, you could sort the various aspects of your character into two columns – strengths and weaknesses. But just naming them doesn’t tell you much about either.

Instead, consider the ways your “weaknesses” contribute to your “strengths.” What if you’ve acquired your strengths because of something you consider a weakness? What if a perceived weakness actually intensifies your strengths? For instance:

Perhaps you’re always late. Others (and maybe yourself) consider this a flaw – an insensitivity to other people’s time, a lack of self-discipline, carelessness, an insult, etc. Perhaps you’re also highly creative, unrestricted, more in-the-clouds than on-solid-ground. What if you’re creative because you’re unrestricted? Or what if you can’t keep track of time because you give your creativity full rein?
Perhaps you have a poor memory. You’re fully aware of this lack, and it’s always been a challenge. Perhaps you’re also an expert in your field (maybe several different fields). What if you delve more deeply into subjects because achieving understanding is your way to work around not being able to remember? Or what if because you prefer to explore, you never committed any energy to cultivating your memory?
Perhaps you are extremely introverted, shy, unwilling to call attention to yourself. You often feel left out, even invisible. Perhaps you’re a natural, instinctive observer and you’ve gained great wisdom through paying close attention to what goes on around you. What if you pay attention to details others miss because you are quiet and reserved? Or what if you think you’re shy only because you can’t observe as well when you’re caught up in the noise and drama of the crowd?

In one sense, the greatest strength and the greatest weakness are often opposite extremes of the same trait. Even when you can’t see a continuum between something you consider a strength and something you consider a weakness, it’s entirely possible they expand each other. In many instances, a strength contributes to a weakness, and a weakness contributes to a strength.

Features

When you’re shopping for a car, you decide the features you’re looking for – sun roof, heated seats, all-wheel drive, trunk space, etc. When you’re looking for a job, you have a list of features you want – local, good hours, challenging but not stressful, benefits, etc. When you’re looking for a romantic relationship, you have a list of desirable qualities – honest, good humor, age range, education level, shared values, etc.

If you find a car you like (or a job or a potential partner), but it doesn’t have everything on your list, you have to decide whether what is there matters more than what’s not there.

What if you fall in love with a car for a reason not on your list? Say it’s a beautifully elegant hybrid, and when you sit at the wheel it feels as if it was crafted just for you, but it doesn’t have a sun roof or all-wheel drive. You decide you can live without those features and you buy it. So now it’s yours. When you’re driving it around, do you care about what it doesn’t have? Or do you appreciate what it does have? To achieve the highest level of enjoyment with your car, find value in both what it has and what it doesn’t have.

Jobs and relationships are, of course, more complicated than cars simply because people are more complicated than machinery. However, the same general rules apply. When you’re giving your attention to what is not, you’re not giving your attention to what is.

Also, what is not might be contributing to what is. The remote, over-committed boss you complain about because you don’t get enough supervision might be the very reason you have a huge amount of autonomy and responsibility. Your achievements at work might be possible because you have to self-manage and make up your job as you go.

It’s almost impossible to sort through the elements of a situation or a relationship and come out with an accurate picture of the ways the various factors influence each other. It’s easier to appreciate what is and what is not, to honor what is and what is not, to celebrate what is and what is not.

Perceptions

Artists talk about negative space – the spaces between. The trick is to look at the empty spaces and see what’s there. This is a counter-intuitive approach. We tend to look for what is there, to recognize the shape and color of what we can see. When you look at a tree, you are more likely to look at the limbs and the leaves than at the shape of the sky between branches.

This tendency to look at what is applies to all aspects of our lives. We tend to consider what we see as true and what we don’t see as not true. Unfortunately, what we see is heavily influenced by such factors as upbringing, beliefs, experience, education, even personality. When we believe something, we tend to look for supporting evidence – and what we look for we tend to see. We’re also likely to reinterpret what we see to support a belief we already hold.

For example, do you believe other drivers are rude or considerate? Either way, you can probably cite myriad instances to support your opinion. As an experiment, I challenge you to start looking for evidence supporting the opposite of what you believe. If you believe all drivers are rude, start noticing acts of consideration. If you believe all drivers are considerate, start looking for rudeness. Either way, you will find what you start looking for.

In Practice

Here are some examples of areas where a shift in perception can help you produce different results:

If you think your child is a brat, start looking for evidence of gentleness, consideration, good humor, or resilience.
If you think money is hard, start looking for evidence of ease, good fortune, plenty, or comfort.
If you think you have a terrible job, start looking for evidence of kindness, cooperation, appreciation, efficiency, or good results.
If you think your body is falling apart, start looking for what works well, where you don’t hurt, and notice when you feel good.

To take it one step further, act as if . . .

Your child is a delightful, enjoyable person.
Money comes easily and shows up unexpectedly.
The people you work with are kind, cooperative, appreciative and produce good results.
Your body is strong and healthy and wants to help you enjoy life.

When you look for something, you will probably find it. When you bring your own positive, willing, eager energy to something, it will begin to respond in kind.

If you want to create different results in any area of your life, I invite you to contact me and investigate personal life coaching.

For a free exploratory session, write me at: kathy@kathyjacobson.com

Tags: Creating, Energy, thinking
Posted in Beliefs, Cause and Effect, Mind Power, Observer Mode, Perspectives, Possibilities | Comments Off

Creative Power

Sunday, July 4th, 2010

(If you would like more information about personal life coaching, or would like a free introductory session, please contact me: kathy@kathyjacobson.com)

LAST SUMMER I PRESENTED a workshop on emotional energy. After considering several ways to approach this, I decided to title it Personal Power.

But when I started to publicize it, I discovered a high level of resistance to the very idea of personal power.

As I listened to reasoning behind the resistance, I found two general themes. The first harks back to a statement made back in 1887 by someone named Baron Acton, “Power tends to corrupt, and absolute power corrupts absolutely.”

Most of us have observed examples of such corruption, whether in extreme cases such as Hitler’s Nazi Germany, or closer to home in domestic situations. When one person (or group of persons) exercises unrestrained control over others, the only result is suffering. The suffering afflicts both abuser and victim – often to the point of destruction.

Perhaps power in this sense can be best understood by such synonyms as dominion, power, authority, rule, force, etc. Quite obviously, nothing good comes from unrighteous dominion, unrestrained power, excessive authority, and tyrannical rule. I contend that the best way to avoid succumbing to that form of corruption is through personal power.

The second form of resistance seems to be a perceived conflict between accessing personal power and surrendering to god. To resolve this conflict, it’s necessary to define the terms. Let’s assume surrendering to god means submission to a higher law and/or living in tune with spirit, or relinquishing the inner restraints that restrict access to spirit. Those exact same meanings can be used to describe accessing personal power. True inner power conforms to universal law and brings you into partnership with spirit.

Let me emphasize I’m advocating accessing power, not acquiring it. You already have power. It’s innate within every human being. Consider that in accessing your power you are, in a sense, also surrendering to it. Either way, you are allowing your power burst into full bloom. You are letting its light guide you to your best good.

So what is personal power?

Personal power is self-mastery. It’s the ability to govern your own energy, to choose what’s true for you, to align with positive results (whatever that means to you), to create your own life, and to manifest miracles.

Why is personal power important?

Because (as far as we know) this life is the only one you’re going to get and you might as well live it fully and joyfully.

In past articles I’ve explored in depth the three energies of thought, action and emotion. I’ve presented five Modes of Mastery and discussed how the energies of the different modes create different results.

I believe these operational modes are universal. No matter who experiences them, the thoughts, actions and emotions or VICTIM mode reinforce helplessness; those of INTERPRETER mode create suffering; those of OBSERVER mode establish calm, those of PARTNER mode enjoy cooperation, and those of CREATOR mode bring oneness. Clearly, the higher energies produce better results.

Your Unique Power

So let’s say, you mostly operate from OBSERVER mode. You stay neutral and when some INTERPRETER emotion pricks you, you simply acknowledge it and release it. With neutrality as your set-point, you often find yourself enjoying PARTNER or CREATOR energy. You participate rather than complain, you imagine rather than dread, you celebrate, love, enjoy, lead, learn, cooperate. You know you can choose love, happiness, tranquility, enthusiasm – and you do. You ask Why not? rather than Why me?

Operating from the higher modes is an essential aspect of personal power. It is the foundation of creation. Self-mastery allows you to consciously create, to live on purpose rather than by accident.

But no two people access their power in the same way. I’ve observed four paths by which people generally make the most of their talents and what’s true for them. They are:

· via the Mind, through thinking.
· via the Heart, through feeling.
· via the Body, through their senses.
· via the Gut (for want of a better word), through intuition.

Today I want to explore two particular aspects of these four paths.

1. Processing Information

You began receiving information while still in the womb, through your biological connection with your mother. Since birth, you’ve gathered information through your senses, through instruction, through formal education, through observation, through repetition, through the conclusions you draw, through extrapolation, and through the energy of others, to name a few.

But two people, sitting in the same room, watching the same scene or hearing the same lesson, can move in opposite directions. One person might pick up on tone of voice and infer a past transgression, the other might hear the high points and leap ahead to a future challenge. A favorite story in my family is when one of my brothers was listening to one of my sisters relate a hilarious experience. All during my sister’s narrative, my brother kept thinking, Wow, it would have been so fun to be there. Only later, as he sifted through the details of her story, did he realize he was there – and it hadn’t been very fun.

If you process information by way of The Mind, you probably want the information you gather to provide truth. You like facts, concepts, ideas, replicable experiments. You assemble information into logical structures. You’re curious about why and to what purpose. Scientists and philosophers are among those who follow the pathway of The Mind.

If you process information by way of The Body, you probably care most about information that contributes to application. You want to know how: How to mix the colors, how to increase your speed, how to maximize available space, how to grow a better tomato, how to increase productivity. Among those who naturally follow the pathway of The Body are athletes, artists of all types and engineers.

If you process information by way of The Heart, you probably care most about information that supports perfection. This isn’t to say you’re a perfectionist, but that you can sense wellness, fullness, trueness, the essential perfect being-ness of whoever or whatever you’re working with. You’re curious about who in terms of “at heart,” at the core. Healers of all disciplines and teachers are among those who follow the pathway of The Heart.

If you process information by way of The Gut, you probably care most about information that supports wholeness. You’re curious about what in terms of what’s possible, what’s next, what’s the key. Among those who follow the pathway of The Gut are inventors and mystics.

2. Overcoming Obstacles

Have you ever been on a ropes course? Obstacles and challenges are constructed from ropes and poles. Participants are pushed out of their comfort zones to surmount heights, cross chasms, scale walls, and cooperate. Most people take on the challenges willingly, hoping to discover new levels of courage, strength, grit, and trust. Occasionally someone will be paralyzed by fear and unable to go on. Some people proceed with eagerness and enthusiasm.

In many ways, life is like a ropes course. Almost every day provides some obstacle, snag, challenge, difficulty, frustration, or accident. Sometimes we know the snag is manageable, sometimes we know we have a safety net, sometimes it’s a challenge we’ve met before and we have experience navigating it. Other time, we’re taken by surprise and we have to find new solutions. Sometimes we’re immobilized, sometimes we proceed with enthusiasm.

Most problems have more than one solution, and different people will resolve them in different ways. The four Paths to Power present four general approaches to overcoming obstacles.

Those who follow the Pathway of The Heart seem predisposed to look for compassionate solutions. They heal, they negotiate, they repair, they work things out. They tend to be extra conscious of the directive to do no harm. In a sense, they love roadblocks out of the way.

Those who follow the Pathway of The Mind look for logical solutions. They identify premises, gather available data, sort through information and put it order, they search out key concepts, and they test for validity. Generally speaking, they think their way around obstacles.

Those who follow the Pathway of The Body like to actively move the obstacle out of the way. As necessary, they’ll learn a new skill, acquire a new tool, put things in a new order, take new action. They will organize, rearrange, dismantle, reassemble, renew their efforts, etc. Basically, they alter roadblocks by doing.

Those who follow the Pathway of The Gut are inclined to dismiss smaller obstacles as of no consequence and see big obstacles merely as challenges. Sometimes they view the solution the same way – as basically irrelevant . Of all the ways, these followers are most likely to leap first and analyze or reflect later. They tend to bypass roadblocks by guessing.

Know Yourself

I’ve often encouraged my clients to intensify their intentions through meditation (even though I don’t meditate in any formal way). Once when I was urging meditation on a musician client, he said, “No, I have to practice.” His firm insistence shifted my thinking in a whole new direction. I realized many of my clients already know what works for them. I realized most people can find their way by instinct, and all I have to do is ask the right questions.

Knowing yourself and your way will provide the following benefits:

· If a way suggested by someone else doesn’t work for you, you realize nothing’s wrong with you. You just need to find the way that is right for you.

· You will be more accepting of someone else’s way. If you’re a thinker, you can stop expecting a logical progression from someone who intuits. If you’re a doer, you can be more patient with someone who patiently heals rather than boldly changes.

· Once you know what works for you, you can apply those techniques to anything you want to create.

· When you master the tools and techniques of your way, you approach life more creatively and less accidentally.

Tags: Creative Power, Overcoming Obstacles, personal power, Processing Information
Posted in Body Power, Gut Power, Heart Power, Mind Power, personal power | Comments Off