In the mid-1990s, I attended a powerful workshop on abundance presented by Unity teacher Edwina Gaines. Somewhere in her workshop, she said, “What is up to you. How is up to God.” It’s the only thing I remember from the workshop, probably because at the time I was caught up in the importance of taking action. Even though she continued with, “Listen for the divine idea,” I couldn’t get past my own belief in the need to do. While I had experienced the importance of aligning emotion with thought, I had also observed over and over again the necessity of also keeping actions aligned. If you want to write a book, you must put words on paper; if you want to take bicycling pack trips, you have to put in the miles; if you want to be healthy, you have to eat properly; etc.
So I pondered and puzzled over Edwina’s words, and after about a decade, I finally got it. I finally learned to differentiate the what from the how. I saw that what is the essence of free will. As human beings, choosing what is our opportunity, our responsibility, our obligation. No force in the universe (not even God) can choose for us. We must choose, and choosing what must come first. If we jump too quickly into the how, we’ll end up with the wrong what. Further, if we try to control the how we limit the miracle.
Taking on Your Part
However, since I’ve been working with the modes of personal power, I’ve begun to see aspects of how that do belong to us. The more I work with emotions, the more I see them as the energy of how. Emotional energy is the force that empowers results. If you want a certain result, you can identify the emotional energy that produces the outcome, generate that emotion within you and then use the energy to fuel the result you’ve chosen. This is not exerting power over your emotions so much as accessing the power of your emotions. In this respect, identifying and investing emotional energy is the how that’s up to you.
I’ve also been observing another interaction between what and how that blurs the boundary between them even more. When you decide you want something, it’s totally natural, perhaps instinctive, to immediately begin mapping out the route between here and there. Whether you call this a business plan, a plan of attack, a project plan, or merely a to-do list, you gain confidence in your idea when you assure yourself of the potential for success by envisioning the means to get there. If you can’t see the how, you may discard the idea immediately. This could be called the process of how-to-what.
Moving From What to How
Consider instead a what-to-how approach.
Begin by identifying what you want. You can be as broad or as particular as you like, but use specific terms. A general sense of something, expressed in general terms can come out hazy and not quite formed, i.e., “I’d like to get to a place in my heart where I can let go of animosity towards others,” or “It’d be nice if I could feel confident enough of my voice to sing in front of people.”
Instead, either the broad statement, “I want joy,” or the specific statement, “I want a happier relationship with someone (by name),” gets more to the heart of what you want. You can say, “I want to live on purpose,” or you can say, “I want to sing at the Met,” and either one can be perfectly accurate and true for you.
To illustrate this for yourself, draw a pyramid on a piece of paper. Draw a horizontal line slightly below the peak of the pyramid, forming a small triangle on top. Write what you want in the triangle. This is your intention. At this point, don’t give a single thought to the large space below the line. Everything below this topmost level is how.
Sometimes we choose things that aren’t true for us. Sometimes we resist something that is true for us. The first how that belongs to you is to make your intention absolutely, totally, 100% true for you.
You may already have a deep emotional connection with what you want. If so, this aspect of how may feel pretty straightforward and easily itemized. Whether you already have that deep connection or you want to achieve it, the following practice can help you strengthen and empower your intention.
1. Imagine what you want as accomplished, manifest, complete, a done deal.
Refuse to let doubts and potential obstacles interfere with this envisioning. If you want joy, imagine you have it. If you want your relationships to be happy, imagine that happiness. If you want to be living your purpose, imagine you are. If you want to sing at the Met, imagine you’re on the stage. See it accomplished, real, now.
If you can’t quite imagine what you want as real, find something comparable you have experienced and recall the feeling. Perhaps seeing yourself on stage at the Met is a bit of a stretch, but when you ski you maneuver the moguls with ease and confidence. Remember the success and pleasure you experience on a challenging slope. Once you feel it, it’s transferable.
2. As you envision what you want as fulfilled, let the emotion(s) of fulfillment bubble up within you. Recognize them and name them. Do you feel happiness? Joy? Peace? Love? Confidence? Exhilaration? Gratitude?
3. Let yourself experience these emotions to the fullest. Be them. Let them expand and fill your entire body. Let them flow down your arms and legs to your fingers and toes. Feel the vibrations of them as fully and completely as you can.
4. Think about your intention and envelop it in this heightened level of your emotions. Infuse it with these emotions.
5. At least once a day, repeat this exercise. Imagine. Identify. Experience. Infuse.
Emotion as How
Choosing and using partner and creator emotions is your part of how. This practice will help you align your thoughts and emotions with each other and with your intention.
When you become truly, fully aligned with your intention, it becomes accomplished. You may not be joyful to the exclusion of pain or suffering, but you see such joy as both possible and attainable. You may not yet be fully living your purpose, but you are fully connected and aligned with that purpose. You may not yet be singing at the Met, but you know without a doubt performance is your destiny. You may not yet have a loving relationship with someone, but you have unflinching trust that best good will unfold for both of you.
And now it’s time to look below the pinnacle of the pyramid. Using horizontal lines, divide the large space into several sections to represent the steps of how – the journey from where you are to where you want to be. Some journeys may have two or three steps, and others may have more than ten. What do you see as your next step along the way, the next leg of your journey?
If joy is your intention, perhaps the next step is a happy home, or peace with your body. If a happier relationship is your intention, perhaps the next step is becoming happier with yourself. If singing at the Met is your intention, perhaps the next step is gaining confidence during auditions. If living on purpose is your intention, perhaps envisioning the ways you can serve others is your next step.
Whatever you see as your next step now become a what. Now you can set a new intention specific to this step. Now you can identify the emotions that will help you partner with it and/or create it. Now you can choose to experience those emotions. Now you can infuse this what with those emotions.
Continue building your pyramid from the top down by converting each successive how into a what. At each level remember that everything beneath the level you’re working on will stay a how until you get there – and as long as it’s a how it’s not up to you.
Enhance your Product
Now draw a strong vertical pole from the base of your pyramid up through the peak. This pole is your product. Your product is what you give to others; it’s the way you do and/or will serve with this intention. It remains a constant, receiving your efforts, no matter what step you are on and no matter what other efforts you make in support of your intention. What you ultimately create will be directly related to your product. In many cases the quality of your product determines the ultimate quality of the miracle.
Some intentions have very obvious products, i.e. the knowledge, the skill, the wisdom, the techniques, the music, the manuscripts, etc. For other intentions, the product can be more nebulous. For instance, if you want joy, what’s the product? Actually, joy is both the what and the how. The more you practice joy – in your heart and in your service – the more joy you’ll have.
This brings us to yet another aspect of how that is up to you. It’s up to you to become a person who is whatever it is you want. When you start asking, “But how do I do this?” practice responding with this answer: “By becoming the person who is this.” (Or has this, or does this.)
If you were already this person, you would already be or have or do. Since you are not or have not or do not, give attention and energy to becoming. Working on the product certainly contributes to your becoming your intention, but action must be supported by thoughts and emotions.
In instances where the intention and the journey are the same, all efforts to become are investments in the product. The core of any product is the service you render. If you are becoming joy, let your joy be a service to others. The more you become your product, the more you enrich the lives of others through the state of your own heart.
Other more physical intentions also require you to be the person who does. As you strengthen your product, refine your thinking. As you refine your thinking, continue to evoke and express partner and creator emotions. Through the energy of you emotions, your thoughts, and your actions, you will become the person who receives. You will manifest the miracles you’ve chosen.
(I offer one-on-one personal coaching. If you would like a free introductory session, please write me: kathy@kathyjacobson.com)
I used to be searching for crucial information on this subject. The knowledge was necessary as I am about to launch my own portal. Thanks for providing a lacking link in my business. Anyway, in my language, there are usually not much good source like this.